Hi JA customer and thanks for writing.
You know I am with you on this and I think your girlfriend is behaving badly. If she is in a committed relationship with you she should behave as if she is and not send other messages to her co workers.
You are not behaving possessively she is simply ill mannered or not aware of the social skills necessary to sustain an intimate relationship. If she is that unskilled that she does not know that her behaviors are inappropriate and she redirects the blame onto you? What kind of a future do you expect with this woman?
I KNOW you can do better. There are plenty of beautiful, intelligent, stimulating young women out there who know how to conduct themselves when they have a boyfriend and you can find one and be much happier than you can ever possibly be with this woman.
She sounds very dim to me.
Look elsewhere and be happy.