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If he is unable to move on and to respect you, then it would make sense that you'd walk away. You've already given him a chance and he's stuck in the past. It would be unhealthy to go after someone who can not either forgive you or stop calling you names and disrespecting you and abusing you verbally. Perhaps this experience is a clue as to how he is even though at times he's trying to act better towards you. If he is not emotionally mature to accept your mistake and deal with it, you won't be able to change him or his behavior. What you've done is in the past. You've got to live in the present and he's not willing to do it. Despite the fact that you love him, you can not sustain the relationship on your own. The guilt you're experiencing would have to be dealt with. You've made a mistake and he's punishing you every day for it after the incident is over.