Hello there! It's great to hear from you again. I think you could solve the first issue by explaining to her that keeping the commitments you make with friends is important to you. Whey any of us break plans with friends repeatedly, we soon find that they stop inviting us! You certainly wouldn't want that to happen in your friendships, particularly given the resentment that it would cause in your relationship with Lisa. Perhaps you could plan one date night each weekend. The other night is reserved for going out with friends -- either as a group, as couples, or just a guys' or girls' night out. If she decides last minute that she's not feeling up to it, that's OK. However, you made a commitment and would like to keep those plans. Tell her you're sorry if that makes her unhappy, but you'd love to make plans for the next day -- What would she like to do? Hopefully spending a date night and allowing her to make plans for the two of you the day after going out with friends will help. Encourage her to go out with friends sometime, too!
Regarding the other issue, oral sex can be a sensitive subject for people. You might try making a big deal out of it when she DOES perform oral sex by telling her how much you like it and making her feel like that act is a great way to satisfy you sexually. When you feel like she's open to an intimate conversation, feel free to ask her what she likes? What feels good to her? What are her favorite things to do in bed? This opens the door for you to answer the same questions. Hopefully by framing the conversation this way it will allow you to grow together by exploring this area and finding out what pleases you both. If you were to approach it by saying that this is something she doesn't do enough of, she might become defensive and you may not get what you want from the conversation.
Hi Jennifer. Um things are a bit rough lately. I have to be honest that her and I talked about the oral thing and a bunch of other stuff. Apparantly she says she loves to do it but she doesnt feel that shes mine because I bring up other girls all ther time. I do have a bad habit doing that. I think its because I never had to be for it ever. Girls or exs just did it whether or not the were happy or in a fight with me. Not sure how to win this one over. And can you believe I am still getting texts from girls who I didnt give a fair chance. Why is it that some women will perform oral or be sexually active whether or not you treat them good and some you have to bend over backwards for. i dont get it.