How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Cathy Your Own Question

Cathy
Cathy, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1436
Experience:  Ms, MS.Ed., thirty years clinical practice
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Cathy is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

What does it take to pick up girls at bars, clubs, and lounges

Customer Question

What does it take to pick up girls at bars, clubs, and lounges successfully?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Cathy replied 3 years ago.

Hi and thanks for writing JA

 

The usual way in these environments is to buy the woman a drink. That is the time honored method. If you are looking for women in these areas then you are probably more interested in a casual or sexual relationship; than a long term more intimate or romantic relationship so think with your wallet and you should do fine. Be careful though. Its hard to judge who are you getting involved with and you do not want to wind up with a professional or a player or someone than can harm you in other ways.

Good Luck.

I hope you get the girl.

Warm regards,

Cathy

Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Never seems to work, they leave and say it was nice meeting u
Expert:  Cathy replied 3 years ago.

Hmmm then clearly there is something in your approach.

 

You know maybe you should look for a girlfriend first and then tackle the pick up thing next? Most people do it this way. I find that many young males learn cues from their female friends about how to behave in such a way that other females find them attractive and desirable. Have you thought about looking for a girlfriend instead of a pick up first?

 

I know if you are looking in bars and lounges there is a reason you want something superficial and without strings attached but even having a girlfriend for six months would improve your chances a lot and you could end the relationship in six months or before things got too serious. Take what you have learned and become a better pick up artist?

 

Let me know what you think and sorry to hear you are struggling so with this.

Warm regards,

Cathy

Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I'm very confused. Seems attraction for me in certain areas is high. Perhaps it's because they don't know me yet. Could be girls looking at me interacting and me not knowing they are looking then when I tall to them it's good. Probably because what they see the first few seconds is the way I am all the time. Clearly it seems it would work in an area where I can be of attraction and of not of places where I have no attraction to last. Such as work out world or other sport areas instead of a place of just talking. Seems in best buy, express, and girls who are in places of work when I talk with them it seems to work perfectly. Only of places of no business or action of no dancing are areas I should avoid totally when I'm seeking a girl? I tried talking to a few in a bar but it never worked once. Girls seem to be judgemental and places where I don't do it correctly they think l'm unattractive but I find to have the mentality of other places that they arn't thinking of at the time. I don't want to change because of them. However it goes it goes. I'll just stay away from areas of bad interest of me. Is this a good idea or bad?
Expert:  Cathy replied 3 years ago.
THIS ANSWER IS LOCKED!
You can view this answer by clicking here to Register or Login and paying $3.
If you've already paid for this answer, simply Login.

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Dear Debra

    Advice Columnist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1719
    I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/DE/deedeeham/2011-1-24_51523_408.64x64.JPG Dear Debra's Avatar

    Dear Debra

    Advice Columnist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1719
    I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/formybunch/2010-12-06_191055_img_0975.jpg Kate McCoy's Avatar

    Kate McCoy

    Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    1235
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/RE/resolutions66/2011-1-17_05728_IMG8202smilingeditedforJustAnswer.64x64.jpg Elliott, LPCC, NCC's Avatar

    Elliott, LPCC, NCC

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1215
    35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/CO/CoachJenK/2012-3-9_31019_Jen.64x64.jpg Coach Jen K.'s Avatar

    Coach Jen K.

    LMSW, CPC

    Satisfied Customers:

    726
    Providing the utmost care and support.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    549
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    349
    Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/SU/suzmsw/2011-9-2_184634_Thisone.64x64.JPG Suzanne's Avatar

    Suzanne

    Therapist, LCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    338
    Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency