Thank you for contacting Just Answer.
I am sorry to hear about the problems you are experiencing. It is extremely difficult to be in an abusive relationship and this definitely sounds like abuse; verbal and emotional. You are correct that it seems that this man has little incentive to leave the relationship since he has such a good deal there. You do not deserve to be treated this way. Since it does not seem that couples therapy has been helpful and I doubt that it would be since he appears to accept no responsibility for any of the problems in the relationship, you may want to consider individual therapy in order to get some support for yourself, build up your self esteem, help you to set boundaries and stop enabling this man to have a relatively free ride. Most areas have counseling centers that offer treatment on a sliding scale so that this may be more affordable for you. Remember that no one deserves to be abused and that includes you. You may find the following website helpful: http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/center_index.php?id=2
In the meantime, be sure to take care of yourself through healthy eating, exercise, rest and reaching out to supportive people in your life. You may wish to contact legal aid to explore what options you have for evicting him from your home whenever you decide that you are ready to take this step. I hope this is helpful.