How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Angela Your Own Question

Angela
Angela, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 681
Experience:  n/a
25365872
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Angela is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

Hi, My boyfriend cheated on his ex three months back while

Customer Question

Hi,

My boyfriend cheated on his ex three months back while dating me (I didn't know he was in a relationship). After phases of emotional turmoils I decided to give him a chance, then we stayed together and happy mostly. I began to trust him and he did try very hard to make me feel comfortable and loved. Last night, I accidentally read an email he wrote to his ex recently, saying things like "i love you", "miss you horribly", "every tiny things I do reminds me of you" (with specific examples) and "it was perfect. I don't know how I messed it up" etc. And his ex still loves him much. I was hurt and confronted him. His explanation was he sometimes felt really guilty about cheating on her, especially when she asked him what she did wrong in their relationship, but he didn't mean it, he just wanted to say something to make her feel better. He said he loved me and only wanted to be with me.

It's my fault to read his personal email in the first place. Sometimes it's better not to know too much? On the other hand I'm glad I did. Such a contradiction. I know it takes time to trust someone, but I also wonder if it's worth continuing this relationship? My love is confused now. I need your guidance.

Thank you.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Angela replied 5 years ago.
Hello my name is Angela.
I am more than happy to assist you with your questions by giving you my honest and respectful opinion.

I think if you believe him then you should give him a chance to actually prove himself to you especially in lieu of the things he wrote in the email, however, at the same time I would also consider this as strike one for him. It does indeed take time for him to earn your trust, therefore, I suggest sharing with him the types of things that will help him earn your trust. Take some time and think about them and then when the two of you are alone discuss them with him. You could begin by saying something such as (using your own words), I want our relationship to be stronger and for us to be closer, and I would like to share with you the things that would make me feel more comfortable trusting you. After the conversation with him continue to enjoy your relationship and see if he actually proves himself to you thereby earning your trust and take it from there.
Angela, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 681
Experience: n/a
Angela and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Thank you, XXXXX XXXXX I ask for examples as to "types of things that will help him earn my trust"? I did ask him to prove the genuineness of his love for me but I can't come up with specific things. Appreciate it.
Expert:  Angela replied 5 years ago.
THIS ANSWER IS LOCKED!
You can view this answer by clicking here to Register or Login and paying $3.
If you've already paid for this answer, simply Login.

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Previous | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Kate McCoy

    Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    1637
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/formybunch/2010-12-06_191055_img_0975.jpg Kate McCoy's Avatar

    Kate McCoy

    Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    1637
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    914
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/mschase2u/2009-01-04_010319_chaseface.jpg Ms Chase's Avatar

    Ms Chase

    Life Coach

    Satisfied Customers:

    853
    Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/AL/aliciamiller/2012-4-9_21330_profilepicture.64x64.jpg Alicia_MSW's Avatar

    Alicia_MSW

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    406
    Specializing in relationship/family counseling
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/NP/nphbrown/2012-7-30_24048_ImYrManSerious1.64x64.jpg Dr. Norman Brown's Avatar

    Dr. Norman Brown

    Marriage Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    401
    Family Therapist & teacher 35+ yrs; PhD research in couples
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    364
    Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/SU/suzmsw/2011-9-2_184634_Thisone.64x64.JPG Suzanne's Avatar

    Suzanne

    Therapist, LCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    338
    Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency