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Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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hey this has been bothering me for a long time now (18 months

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hey this has been bothering me for a long time now (18 months in fact) when my ex girlfriend left me for a guy (im a girl by the way) after 5 years 2gether and i found out about him and asked her she lied and said she wasnt seeing anyone even tho she knew she had been seen with him and my friends told me. Then she tried to stay in touch by text and asked me 2 meet up with her saying "please i really need to see u" her words not mine, so i met her but she said it was just 2 b friends. I dont understand any of this coz i have other friends and i dont say 2 them please meet me i really need 2 c u. After i said i cant b just friends coz u will always b much more 2 me than that and it wud hurt 2 much. She told me alot of lies over our time 2gether so i said after i get all my things from u thats it no further contact, she wasnt happy by that and when i got th last of my things the last thing she ever said 2 me was "IM GLAD YOUR OUT OF MY LIFE FOR GOOD NOW" that hurt so much after 5 years 2gether. i still love her with all my heart and soul and miss her all the time. we didnt speak for 7 months after that and i started a new job but when she found out where i worked she kept walking past and looking at me through the window but never came in or anything. Iv left that job now and all in all its been 15 months since we talked, can u give me any advice on her behaviour coz i just dont understand, some people have said she must have been giong through "a phase" with me and just went back to guys but i find it hard to believe that a phase wud last 5 years and we lived 2gether and were about to get a mortgage that was her idea. help
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 4 years ago.

Good Morning,

 

It is possible that she may have been opportunistic while in a relationship with you. She may also have been experimenting with her sexuality/life style.

She could also be bisexual or bicurious. Her words to you though would not be excused by any of the reasons behind her behavior.

 

She may have gone by your work out of curiosity or to antagonize you or for attention from you. Behavior is always purposeful and the purpose is not always clearly defined.

 

Even though you still have feelings for her, she does not seem as someone trustworthy.There is no need for people to be spiteful once they separate. She had even hurt you after the separation.

 

You may not have yet met the next love of your life. Unless you are ok with her abusive behavior, you would be happier with time. You've got to respect yourself in order for others to respect you. She had walked over your emotions. Why not allow yourself some happiness despite the situation?



Edited by Dr Rossi on 7/12/2010 at 3:29 PM EST
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience: Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
Dr Rossi and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you

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Dr Rossi
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Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.