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Jennifer
Jennifer, School Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 397
Experience:  Extensive experience fostering family relationships through consultation / counseling.
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Good morning and praise the Lord! I pray that this is Godly

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Good morning and praise the Lord! I pray that this is Godly counseloring because we need help. My husband curses and hollers at me - sometimes every other day or at least once a week. He says, you don't have any sexual desires. I have many times pressed through his holler and cursing to show him that I forgive him and praying so hard that he will not treat me like this again. But just give it a week or maybe the same day he will find something that will cause him to get up set - he's back to hollering and cursing me. I leave, go sit in the car hoping he will calm down. I try to talk with him about this type of behavior that I am not made to endure this - God said, "for you to love me as Christ loves the church and not treat me harshly. Please help -something I can share with him also. Oh, when I cry after he has hollered and cursed me - he says, "I'm acting like a child".
Hello and thanks for using Justanswer.com!

It sounds as though your relationship could use the kind of guidance provided through couples counseling. Counseling is a safe place to share feelings and work toward a goal together with assistance from a professional. You may want to speak with you religious leader -- Sometimes they perform this function of guiding couples through difficult times. Or he/she may be able to refer you to someone whose counseling is provides within a Christian framework. Many couples who go through counseling together find that it strengthens their relationship with one another. I wish you the best of luck!
Customer: replied 6 years ago.

 

 

Jennifer,

 

How should my emotions be? Should I be able to function as if nothing has happen? Should I be sexual active after being called whores, bitches, etc? Am I acting like a child? Why is it doesn't see that he has caused me tremendous hurt? What about my healing after being treated like this?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You have every right to be hurt by these behaviors. Your lack of sexual desire is also normal -- Foreplay is never supposed to include name calling and belittling! The behavior your describing is verbal abuse. Your are not acting like a child at all. I strongly encourage you to seek guidance through counseling -- both for yourself (individual counseling) to learn how to cope with this situation and how to take care of yourself (e.g., seeking support from others, standing up for yourself, accessing resources, etc.) as well as for the two of you in couples counseling to learn how to move forward in a mutually respectful relationship.
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Thank you ever so much!
You're very welcome. Please click "accept" and feel free to leave feedback when prompted to do so. :)
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