The thing is that it was based on a gut feeling. Therefore I did not confront him. I discovered through a little brainracking what his email password XXXXX XXXXX unbelievable as it seems, I cracked it. There I discovered these website passwords with dates and times of logins and money spent.
Of course, I could never tell him that. It is unfair to have violated his privacy in such a manner, but I had to set to rest my gut feeling.
I found my way around bringing up the subject, saying a girlfriend of mine had discovered her bf was doing it so I could get a reaction from him. He just acted idignated saying "Wow, how can a guy be that stupid? Especially if he's in a relationship? Trust me, I wouldn't"
So... to answer the question about trust, no, I can't as he lies straight to my face about that. But does it really mean he is not trustworthy or simply he is ashamed of his addiction to this? After that, he canceled his subscriptions, but it lasted 1 month before he subscribed again... I know that only because I checked his account... He simply will never own up to it...
I really need your help.
Actually, it was based on facebook. Technology hardly helps couples. And a girl kept writing things like "Hi sweetheart, just a kiss, give me news" etc....
I asked him straight out. simply, calmly, but he got angry and dismissed me saying she is just an email buddy he'd never met. My gut feeling by then was screaming "there is sthing very wrong" That is why I checked. He dismissed my gut feeling, saying I was totally wrong. I tried to believe so. But the feeling kept eating at me stronger and stronger. It was either I found answers by myself or I couldn't trust MYSELF and my intuition anymore....
Well... I do know it is bad as far as trust goes. To know he is lying to my face about this is tough. Yet if I were to do sthing I am ashamed of, I would most probably lie as well to be honest. Most of us would. My question really lies in: Why do men feel the urge to use these websites even if in a relationship. That is what I need to understand.
To face it, nobody is perfect. We all lie at some stage, we all have skeletons in our cupboards. And we won't really talk about them. I want to know why men use these kind of websites? Can an addict to those websites truly feel in love and commited, or is it a sign he is not?
He has always been quite a loner, spending most of his time in front of his computer for years before we met. A single child, he only had one serious relationship 8 years before he met me. Could it be an addiction?