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Anna
Anna, Social Worker
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1945
Experience:  29 years experience in addictions & mental health. I'll tell you my honest opinion.
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My boyfriend is an alcoholic. He wants to see me when it suits

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My boyfriend is an alcoholic. He wants to see me when it suits him. Hes nice oneday, then acts like he hates me another. Yesterday he was angry because I was looking at him, I was sitting on his lap. He was acting strange and could barely look at me. He said he doesnt want to see me all the time. I see him 2 to 3 times a week. At Xmas he buys me beautiful presents. Confused, Why would he do that if he didnt care.


Hi yoga,

It sounds to me like there are times when his alcoholism directs his behavior and times when his normal self is in control. Many describe this Jekyll/Hyde effect as being very troublesome and scary, especially when it carries on into the alcoholic's recovery. (Even when they're in a period of sobriety that lasts weeks & months, they can still do this.) If you click the blue link above, it explains it a bit more.

You should decide what is acceptable behavior to you. Some like the roller coaster, some don't. Remember that when you take him, you take both parts. You never have to accept intolerable behavior from anyone, and don't deserve to be treated poorly.

Anna
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Customer: replied 6 years ago.

Thankyou. Why do you think he doesnt like me to look at him though, is that to do with the alcohol behaviour too?

 

 

 

Hey Yoga,

 

I think he's feeling ashamed of himself and seeing himself reflected in your gaze crushes him. He doesn't want to know the truth of the pain he's causing you. That's my guess.

 

Anna

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