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Dr.G., Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1473
Experience:  Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota
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I have no 1 to talk to about this & I am lost as to what to

Customer Question

I have no 1 to talk to about this & I am lost as to what to do. Me & my husband have been married for 7 years & have had a wonderful marriage until about 6 mo. ago. We worked for the same company, I was the Admin. the facilites manager (a day shift position) and he is a supervisor (on a weird shift; 2 graveyard shifts, 2 swing shifts and 1 day shift.) I felt as if he was cheating on me but I thought that it couldn't be happening. In October I woke up to him storming through the house mad... For whatever reason he heard that I was cheating on him with his boss. His boss and I were friends and that was it; it was a strickly professional relationship. Then come to find out he told my boss and I got fired. They were unable to prove that something was between us but I still lost my job and my husband did not. He finally admitted to cheating on me; we decided to work on our relationship but all he does is ingore me, never tells me important information... etc I need some advice...
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr.G. replied 6 years ago.
I am sorry about your recent situation. I don't know how that was possible that you got fired for something that did not happen. I hope you are consulting legal help on the matter because you might have a case. Anyway, about the marriage. If you decide to make it work, which you have every right to end it, then it is going to take work on both parts. If you can't work it out on your own then you guys need to go to marital therapy. I think you should come up with a list of things you need from your husband to do in order to earn his trust and then see if he can follow through. His actions are proving that he does not want to make it work. I always tell the couples I see is that I look for action and not just talk. He needs to prove to you that he wants to make it work through his actions and not just the things he says. If he is unwilling to show you his trust then you have your answer about making the relaitonship work. You can only do so much in this situation. It is up to him to make the effort to repair this and if he puts forth no effort then unfortunately it is not going to work between you two. Let him know how you feel and the things you need for him to do to earn your trust and then go from there. Good luck.

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