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Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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I am a gay male. I was approached by a co-worker (who is straight)

Customer Question

I am a gay male. I was approached by a co-worker (who is straight) on April 30, 2008 who stated he was attracted to me and that he was curious (not knowing before hand that I was gay) and that he wanted to come over to my house. Well, we never got together, then on August 30, 2008 he told me that he wanted me to "go and do my own thing". Well, I was very overbearing with him, so I backed off and gave him his space. He did tell me that it WAS NOT another guy. August '09 he started warming up to me again. In September his flurting e-mails began again and we starting have sexual talks and he started getting erections in front of me just by being around me. That tells me that there is something else there other than just being curious. Nov, 2009 the e-mails stopped and our talks, he said that there is no other guy and I have nothing to worry about and he would say if there were another guy he would tell me. He won't tell me how he feels about me so I don't know what to think
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 6 years ago.

Good Morning,

 

You are correct (if he does not tell you how he feels, you won't know)

 

If you are not interested in him, it is best to leave work and pleasure separately. Otherwise, you may find yourself in a potentially undesirable situation if he causes some problems for you at work. Also, employers have access to their subordinates emails and you may want to avoid using those for email exchanges with him.

 

You can still let him know that you're open if he'd like to talk to you. It seems that this is been going on for quite some time now especially if you never got together. Sometimes it is best to leave things as they are. This guy may be confused or not wanting to get in the open. Just ask yourself- how long would you want to drag this with him and what would you get in the end? If it seems more of a hassle, look elsewhere.

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