It sounds that at the moment there aren't any options as to how to leave the marriage.
It is unhealthy to stay in it, and as you're describing there is no where to go. If you have explored all other options of where to go and will remain in this relationship for the time being, if possible to get some therapy for yourself may be helpful. If you have a social network of friends, family, church members etc. staying connected with them will provide some support. While you remain in the relationship at least you would have something else to focus on and people to engage with. Therapy will offer an opportunity for soul searching and coming to some other options that you may have not though of before.
payments only post upon clicking the Accept button.
I don't see another post - only this one.
Some churches offer free counseling and even though you are down, when you engage with others they can lift your spirits up little by little.
I am not sure if you are still wondering about payments. Even if a deposit is made we do not get paid unless someone clicks the accept button and there had been no payments on this thread.
I had advised twice that we do not get paid unless accept is clicked (hence, you did not have to click that if you did not want to pay) I will initiate a refund to be given to you by Just Answer.
You are correct. Only you can try to help yourself and there are others in your life that surely care for you.
After I had opted out, I replied to you out of courtesy.