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Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year now and about

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My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year now and about a month ago he told me that he was depressed and felt like being alone at times. I offered to help but he said it wasn't fair and didn't want to drag me along. He also reassured me that he loved me and has no intentions of being with anyone else. Hes also a JW but is not active anymore and feels like maybe he wants to start focusing on himself and going to church again. He says he doesn't want to lose me and calls me everyday and we continue seeing each other.. I have stopped pressuring him and told him that ill be there for him. But a couple of days ago I gave him an ultimatum, either he wanted to be with me or he didn't but that I was tired of being in between. His answer was that he cared about me so much but that hes committed to succeeding in his career because growing up he wasn't provided with the things he needed. He says he overcompensates with work because he isn't happy with himself and cannot be with me like that. I'm 20 and he's 23, what should I do?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 5 years ago.

Good Evening,

 

It is not unusual for someone who is depressed to isolate from others.

The best thing is to continue to encourage him to socialize and to do things with you whether it is going for a walk, out for a coffee, anything that will get him out of the house and engaged in doing something with you. It may not be a long activity but just something that you know he used to enjoy doing with you.

You could also offer to go with him to see a psychiatrist for medication and if he wants to go to counseling. The medication will be helpful but he would also need to address some of the issues that are bothering him such as workholism in order to avoid other things or to compensate for something that he feels he should.

 

Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience: Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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Dr Rossi
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Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.