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Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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My boyfriend and I started dating 5 months. He moved 600 miles

Customer Question

My boyfriend and I started dating 5 months. He moved 600 miles away 2 months ago and he started distancing himself. I knew he didn't like the fact that we were so far apart. I told him a month ago that I wasn't going to be able to move up there in dec. I just found out that he was crushed by this. Then 3 days ago he broke things off saying he wasn't feeling it anymore. But I emailed him since when he called I couldn't talk to him about things and told him I was 2 sec away from emailing him to say I think i could move up there. He asked how. Then after I explained said it still wouldn't be a good idea. So why would he ask that if he knew it wouldn't be a good idea? And I have already applied to many places up there so should I still move if I do get a job?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 7 years ago.

Good Afternoon,


Moving to another area and getting situated there can be very stressful. He may have not yet felt quite grounded there (he may be questioning if he himself wants to stay there)

Another possibility is that he may feel that once you move there things can get more serious and that he is not ready for a large commitment. Dating someone for 5 months does not always allow for the people to get to know each other as well as if they had been together longer. There can be many speculations as to why he had said something and the only way to know for certain is to ask him maybe over the phone versus email. At least you could make things clear on your end that you feel committed and as you've mentioned had even applied for jobs there.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
He probably won't stay there for more than another year and half, maybe 2 and a half years based on the economy. We talked on the phone a little bit and I told with every inch of me that I thought the break up was wrong, but he simply said "you sound like someone who has just been broken up with". I know it was bad of me, but I tried to convince him that I want a second chance to better communicate, but he said he's made up his mind and that he hasn't regretted his decision.
So I guess the question is, would moving up there make me seem clingy or a little stalkerish? even though I will most likely talk to him if i do get a job up there before I actually moved?

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