How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Rosemary S. Your Own Question

Rosemary S.
Rosemary S., Human-Svs/Counseling
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6
Experience:  Masters in Human-Svs- Counseling.
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Rosemary S. is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

hi my name is mel, i broke up with my ex 4months ago due to

Customer Question

hi my name is XXXXX XXXXX broke up with my ex 4months ago due to i got in depression cause i had whooping cough and doc had to derminate my pregnancy at this point he didnt no, about month ago i got in contact with him we sat and talked about it everything was cool, we were dating almost a year um he told me that he started to date 18 yr old a week and a half later after we broke up since talking again he has gotten rid of her, he is coming out to see me thursday i decided to ask him to a event thats coming up sat night but he said do i have to remind u this is as friends!! i love him heaps and im 23 and he is 30 i actually asked him if there was a chance of us getting back together he said he cant see this happening atm well not yet something close to that, is there like no hope the event we are going to is theme park, how do i reignite a spark in him thanks
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Rosemary S. replied 6 years ago.





It appears that you are an individual who has endured a 'serious personal tragedy' during these last several months.


I think it is wise on your part to recognize this, as you are seeking a neutral third party opinion at 'Just Answer.' This is a good start.


It also appears that perhaps there is some uncertainty, and/or confusion, as to whether or not, you and your ex-boyfriend have any type of a future together.


(Even under more positive circumstances, this is a common concern, you are not alone.)


Although it appears that the two of you are currently having some regular dialogue, perhaps there is some uncertainty, and/or confusion, by both of you in regard to your feelings for one another, as well as if the two of you have a future together as 'a couple.'


(I assume from your comments that when the two of you sat down and talked about 'it,' you were referring in part, to the personal tragedy you outlined in your question.)


I urge you to consider seeking some in-person 'professional counseling,' as soon as possible.


I strongly suggest, you begin making inquiries regarding receiving some professional counseling immediately. (Given the severity of the experiences you have recently endured.)


The 'mental health professional' may help you discover other feelings you could be unaware of, that you may be currently experiencing.


After what you have recently endured, it is okay to seek 'professional help' in 'working through' the 'healing process.'


You may want to start by contacting a local hospital in your area. Perhaps they have a 'referral service,' where they would be able to recommend a competent 'mental health professional.'


You may also want to contact your 'personal physician.' Perhaps he, or she, can recommend a 'mental health professional.'


If financial affordability is an issue, please be certain to mention this. Perhaps they can recommend a 'mental health professional' who would charge a more reasonable fee.


Also, maybe either the 'referral service' or your 'physician,' would be able to recommend a 'not-for-profit counseling center' in your area, where you could receive some quality counseling at a more affordable fee. (*Some centers may provide individual, couples, and group counseling, at more affordable fees. This may vary.)


In addition, another idea, is possibly joining a 'support group' where you could discuss what you have experienced with other people who may have experienced a similar situation. This could be useful, perhaps in addition, to any individual counseling you may seek. Peer support can also be very beneficial.


Maybe the 'referral service,' your 'physician,' and/or 'counseling center,' could recommend a 'support group' for you as well.


Lastly, maybe both you, and your ex-boyfriend, could consider seeking some 'couples counseling,' or both participate in a 'support group' together. (Perhaps the sources suggested above could recommend one.)


I say this because, as stated above, it appears from your question that perhaps both you, and your ex-boyfriend, are experiencing an array of feelings which have yet to be uncovered.


Although you have experienced both the physical pain, as well as the emotional pain, your ex-boyfriend has also suffered a loss as well.


Perhaps the options suggested above, would be able to help either you alone, or both of you, in determining if you would have any type of a future together.


Maybe after what you both have recently experienced, it is too soon for either of you to know what you want during this difficult time. This is certainly understandable.


Perhaps you both need some time to work through the 'healing process' with the 'proper professional help,' either separately, or together, before making any important decisions.

(Which could have an impact on both of your futures.)


Good luck!, and best wishes.

Rosemary S.



Legal Disclaimer: The information provided above, is general information only and is not intended to serve as a long, or short term, professional relationship. By providing the above information, I am not engaging in a 'relationship designee - client relationship' with you. The above information is only intended to provide general information. The fee that you may pay me, is for general information only. No part of this disclaimer can be reproduced, or copied, without the express consent of Rosemary S., the owner.


*If you find this information to be helpful, then please click 'accept.' Otherwise, I will not be financially compensated for the time, and effort, I spent on answering this question. Thank you, XXXXX XXXXX good luck.

Edited by Rosemary S. on 10/14/2009 at 3:58 AM EST

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Previous | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX

Meet The Experts:

  • Kate McCoy

    Kate McCoy


    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
< Last | Next >
  • Kate McCoy's Avatar

    Kate McCoy


    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist


    Satisfied Customers:

    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • Ms Chase's Avatar

    Ms Chase

    Life Coach

    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
  • Alicia_MSW's Avatar



    Satisfied Customers:

    Specializing in relationship/family counseling
  • Dr. Norman Brown's Avatar

    Dr. Norman Brown

    Marriage Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    Family Therapist & teacher 35+ yrs; PhD research in couples
  • Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L


    Satisfied Customers:

    Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
  • Suzanne's Avatar


    Therapist, LCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency

Related Relationship Questions