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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1761
Experience:  PHD LPC
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Im 29 years old and left home when I was 17 due to a very

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I'm 29 years old and left home when I was 17 due to a very domineering mother. Since I left she has been continuely bothering me wanting the relationship we never had. I ve tried to explain to her and help her understand I'm not up for it she then accuses me of not careing about her which is not true I am just not in agreement with her. After 12 years she still doesn't get it and I feel enough is enough what to do?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Keane replied 7 years ago.
Hi,

You are being very strong in your decision to not let your mom intefere with your life.You have explained where you stand with her and that's that. Accusations are the result of her frustration of not being able to control. What do you do? You have and are doing it. Just don't let her keep picking at you with accusations. Tell her you are saying this once and if she doesn't stop barraging you with her accusations you will have to stop being in contact with her. Tell her you are an adult, you are living the life you want to live and she can be a part of it on your terms. If she demands more tell her that is all you are able to offer and if she wants any type of relationship with you she will have to accept it as it is.
Don't fight with her, argue with her etc..just state what YOU want and be done. Then it's up to her to say okay or not. 12 years is a long time to be badgered. If that doesn't work then you may have to tell her that you can't listen anymore and won't be in contact until she decides to accept the relationship you want. Over time things may mellow and she may not remain as she is now, then you may have the opportunity to have a better relationship.
I hope this helps.
Dr, Keane
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