Thank you very much for the answer.
I am really confused now because he never hit me again, but just tore my shirt once. Also for some reason when we got into an argument, I got so angry at him and yell at him that I think it is partly my fault, that I am the one hurting him. He told me I treat him like a dog and I need to get into anger management class.
I agree I have to, but in the meantime, I think being together will cause so much damage. He could not understand this and blame me for running away, saying that I am the bad person for finding more faults just so I can get away from this relationship. He made me feel so guilty.
I am not one to stay long in a relationship so I thought it was my fault, too.
I guess my question is:
1. Is it still abuse if he tore my t-shirt just a little bit? Usually abusive situations escalate, but this time, it is better, so should I give him a chance?
2. Am I really the kind of girl who runs away from a relationship or is there a legitimate reason?
3. If he says he will change, and it will take time, that means I have to break up with him anyway right, since in the meantime he will be abusive anyway?