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Walter
Walter, Relationship Mentor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 11528
Experience:  Mentoring couples on relationship issue and self understanding. (JA's Relationship Mentor)
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I have been dating my boyfriend for about 7 months. Sometimes we

Resolved Question:

I have been dating my boyfriend for about 7 months. Sometimes
we see each other twice a week. But, mostly we just see each other
once a week on Saturday night. I would like to see him more, but do not
know how to bring this up. Or, if I even should.
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Walter replied 4 years ago.
<p>Hello,</p><p> </p><p>If your ready to start spending more time together then there is no reason not to say anything, often in relationships we tend to fall into a routine and never change it up because things fit nicely together. But in this case talking to him and asking him about more time is nothing to be worried about.</p><p> </p><p>I would suggest starting out slow, mention to him that you wish you could see him more often. If he does not offer up any suggestions, then say something like "I miss you when I only see you once or twice a week, I think we should start spending more time together"</p><p> </p><p>That should set the tone of the conversation and then you can both sit down and decide what route is best for you.</p><p> </p><p>Walter</p>
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Hi

I appreciate your answer. However, right now the routine is that we mostly see each

other once a week.. sat night through sunday afternoon or evening.

 

I am afraid to say that I want to see him more as I understand if you do this men

can feel that you are putting pressure on them and being needy. However, and don't know if this makes a differnce, we are both quite grown up and not teenagers.

 

It is very upsetting to me that it seems he is okay with just seeing each other once a week and it seems to me that if he wanted to see me more, he would ask to do so.

 

I am very torn as to say something or not.

Expert:  Walter replied 4 years ago.

Hello,

 

Communication is key in any relationship, as for the looking needy or putting pressure this might be considerable if you were teenagers or young adults who are just starting life. The fact is when you are in a relationship you must be able to talk to each other and let each other know your feelings without worrying about being needy or insecure. If this was a matter where you saw each other 3-4 times a week, then maybe it might look like pressure.......but at only once a week this is just a natural path that you should both be wanting at this point.

 

Keep in mind he may feel the same way you do, but does not want to look needy either. At the end of the day many men are afraid to ask for more time for fear they will smoother their girlfriends and then lose them. As long as your not being demanding and simply explain you would like to see him more there is no reason to believe he will feel he is being pressured.

 

Walter

Walter, Relationship Mentor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 11528
Experience: Mentoring couples on relationship issue and self understanding. (JA's Relationship Mentor)
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