How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Walter Your Own Question

Walter
Walter, Relationship Mentor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 11528
Experience:  Mentoring couples on relationship issue and self understanding. (JA's Relationship Mentor)
997364
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Walter is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I recently reconnected with my highschool crush through facebook..I

Resolved Question:

I recently reconnected with my highschool crush through facebook..I wasn't looking for him but we just happened to speak and it began from there.We have been communicating since June 2009 through texts,emails photos and of course the phone calls..He has never been married and doesn"t have any children which is great..but I have 3 children ages 13,14,15 from a previous relationship which lasted 15 years and was horrible with the exception of our children..Anyway I was hurt from my past relationship after being separated for 2 years and did not wish to date fearing I would be rebounding and ruin a potential healthy situation from hang ups from my past disastrous relationship..The new friend in my life has made me so happy just through our chatting and constant commnication we can talk for hours and have not seen eachother in person for over 20 years..My question is we have a lot of similiar interest and he does want children and to be in a healthy committed relationship.
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Walter replied 4 years ago.

Hello,

 

It sounds like you have been taking things slow which is great, when you have children the last thing you want is to jump into anything that may hurt you or them. As for being a rebound, I do not suspect that this is the case. A rebound typically is when someone jumps into a relationship head first and gets caught up quickly. In your case you have handled this well.........getting to know each other and just communicating.

 

I think continuing with this may be a good thing for you and your children. Just because your marriage did not work does not mean you should give up completely. It just means that you are a little more experienced and need to take it slow.

 

I would suggest continuing what you are doing now and maybe setting up a date and go from there. Take it slow and get to know each other and at your own pace. Of course you already know not to jump to fast. The key is to look at this and not the past, of course you are going to be weary after what you experienced before but the fact remains that not all relationships end in such a way and not everyman is going to be like your ex. Give your new friend a chance to show you who he is by taking it slow and enjoying each other.

 

I know it is hard jumping back into that pond, but as long as you are keeping your eyes open and giving him a chance to show you who he is then you are unlikely to make the mistakes you are afraid of.

 

Walter

 

If my answer was helpful please don't forget to click accept. We can still communicate if you have any additional questions or would just like to talk.

Walter, Relationship Mentor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 11528
Experience: Mentoring couples on relationship issue and self understanding. (JA's Relationship Mentor)
Walter and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Thank you..I was feeling the same way.This guy and I have been candid and he wants to know every detail about such as my likes and dislikes.He has shared a lot with me as well.He has mentioned how he was very imature and was totally different from the man he is today,he also stated that he isn't perfect and has grown from mistakes in the past.He always ask about my children and has stated that he's not going to let me get away again and feels that this is fate..how we reconnected and both happen to be available at this time he doesn't know it but his presence has helped me see that my ex has definitely taken me for granted and to realize that i deserve love and respect.We plan to see eachother on his birthday and spend the day together..He also asked me to not tell anyone I'm single any longer I guess to exclude any other potential suitors I will take it slow..but this heart has been vacant for so many years she is happy and I can smile again which was something I did but i do this more often ..even if this relationship doesn't work i don't want to be in that negative place again w kids dad took mr and left me in a pool of despair.I think this is unusual since i have never solely communicated with a man this way..My friend also told me he wants us to be friends before we fool around and get things confused ..he is hoping that we are compatible and have a grounded relationship as friends and lovers before we get carried away and have sex as a basis only which i don't desire as well!I was in a place where i didn't think that i was beautiful or deserving of happiness..I have been lifted from all of this and it took me a while to see myself as the girl as once was who grew into a lovely women who has big heart and a friend till the end and a great mom.Thank you....FOR YOUR RESPONSE AGAIN!
Expert:  Walter replied 4 years ago.
THIS ANSWER IS LOCKED!
You can view this answer by clicking here to Register or Login and paying $3.
If you've already paid for this answer, simply Login.

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Dear Debra

    Advice Columnist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1719
    I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/DE/deedeeham/2011-1-24_51523_408.64x64.JPG Dear Debra's Avatar

    Dear Debra

    Advice Columnist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1719
    I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/formybunch/2010-12-06_191055_img_0975.jpg Kate McCoy's Avatar

    Kate McCoy

    Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    1235
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/RE/resolutions66/2011-1-17_05728_IMG8202smilingeditedforJustAnswer.64x64.jpg Elliott, LPCC, NCC's Avatar

    Elliott, LPCC, NCC

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1215
    35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/CO/CoachJenK/2012-3-9_31019_Jen.64x64.jpg Coach Jen K.'s Avatar

    Coach Jen K.

    LMSW, CPC

    Satisfied Customers:

    726
    Providing the utmost care and support.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    549
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    349
    Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/SU/suzmsw/2011-9-2_184634_Thisone.64x64.JPG Suzanne's Avatar

    Suzanne

    Therapist, LCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    338
    Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency
 
 
 

Related Relationship Questions