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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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Are marriage counselors always set on keeping two people together

Resolved Question:

Are marriage counselors always set on keeping two people together? I have been married for 15 years and have been miserable for about 14 of them. We have two children. I am in love with another woman and have told my wife that I want a divorce. I have agreed to counseling only to protect my children, and am hoping the counselor will be able to also show my wife that we are not meant to be together. Is this realistic?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 7 years ago.
Hello

I cannot speak for every counselor but I would think that counseling between couples usually has a goal of trying to work things out for the best. If your wife is looking at counseling as a way to repair the marriage, then that is how she will enter into therapy. If the two of you agree that this is a way of deciding whether you should or shouldn't be together, then you need to be clear about that goal. Ultimately, you have to think about how you feel in the situation as well as remembering the reasons why you and your wife got together to begin with. If you say you've been unhappy for so long, them maybe it is time to talk to her about ending the relationship. She also deserves the opportunity to find someone to love her as well. The best way to protect your children is to maintain a civil relationship with their mother without fighting and bad feelings between one another (as much as possible), show your children that despite everything you still have love and respect for their mom and that will go a long way toward protecting them. I hope this helps. Let me know if you want to talk more

Warmly,

Chase
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