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KimberlyF
KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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i have a problem with my boyfriend,we live together, and he

Customer Question

i have a problem with my boyfriend,we live together, and he supports me,and he told me he loves me. But whenever we are out door he looks at other women, while im with him. And thats making me very uncomfortabel. I told him a copel of times to stop doing that, but actually i tink it got worse after i told him. He still looks at other women , while im talking to him,and he even stop talking to me,if he see a hot lady. The ting is he is really nice to me, in all other aspects, and treats me good ,but i get really offended when he do that,then i would ignore him,each time this happens. then he ask me whats wrong? I feel like he is disrispectfull so my trust,and my respect for him is getting lower each time. i feel like he is unfaithfull, even though i belive he dont do anyting behind my back, just by turning his head to look at other women, while im with him fills me with panic. what does this mean? i really am tinking to leave him for this reason, am i wrong?tankyou so much please help
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 5 years ago.

HiCustomer

 

Men staring at women while their girlfriends or wives are with them is very common because it's a man's instinct to look at an attractive women even if they are not alone. It's something that happens every day in relationships everywhere yet most women have no idea how to handle it when their boyfriend stare at other women with them in their presence. Your first instinct when your boyfriend looks at other women is likely to ask him what he's doing or ask him to stop. The truth is that most men do it without thinking. Men are incredibly visual and for them nothing is more appealing to the eye than a pretty girl. When the woman they are with sees them looking at someone else, what was suddenly something fairly meaningless to the man becomes an argument. You have to remember that your boyfriend isn't looking at other women because he's thinking or replacing you with her, he's may be simply appreciating how attractive she is.

 

There are things you can do when your boyfriend looks at other women that will actually draw him closer to you. Even though you may feel a very strong urge to make an argument about it or make an insult about the woman he's looking at, don't. It will make you look like you are jealous and untrusting and it makes him want to do it more. If you do you'll instantly appear insecure to him. You don't want this to happen. If you do happen to think she's unattractive or that she's dressed too provocatively, keep those thoughts to yourself. What you should be doing is either not reacting at all, or better yet, saying something positive about her. It's especially helpful if you notice her first and can point her out to him it will completely catch him off guard. It will also demonstrate that you don't feel threatened by other women. This suggests to your boyfriend that you are not only confident but that you trust him. Your boyfriend may be doing it just because it gets a reaction out of you and he likes the attention even if it's negative attention. If you take this new and better approach when your boyfriend looks at other women, you may be rewarded by more attention from him. He'll see that you aren't the jealous type which will make him appreciate you even more.

KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience: Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
KimberlyF and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
tankyou so much doctor KimberlyF. Your advice makes alot of sence, and i tink also ive been insecure about my self already, because of him staring at other women. And it might is too late,because i tink he already tinks im jealous because of my attitude,after him looking at other ladies, but i will try to do as you advice me. i had bad experiences in other relation ship, but i never had this kind,and i had no clue why he did that to me. i was really hurt and miserabel too. i wanted to panish him for that,and i did by being mean to him. but i hurt my feelings more. but im definetely satisfied with your answer though. tankyou so much........tankyou.yours sincierlyCustomer
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 5 years ago.
Customer

 

You're welcome and let me know if you need my help again. Good luck to you both!

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