How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Cher Your Own Question

Cher, Relationship Enthusiast
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 20851
Experience:  Extensive experience as Educator/Teacher, M.A., Counselor, Spouse, Parent, Psychic Advisor
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Cher is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

A few days ago me and my boyfriend had an argument. Then after

This answer was rated:

A few days ago me and my boyfriend had an argument. Then after a few hours he thought we souldnt be together. He said that he's messed up as a person and I would be happier without him. Which is alie. I love him so much and I know he loves me too. I refuse to give up on him and us. And I've been trien so hard to convince him to not let me go and its been tough. Last nite he said he would take more time to think about the descion. I texted him earlier but he hasn't responded. I've been so anxious and scared bout wat he's gonna say.I just dnt know wat to do.
Hi shantel,

What are your ages?

How long have you been together?

Can you tell me about the argument?

Why did he say he's messed up as a person? Do you know what he's referring to when he says this?

Thanks for all your additional detail.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
We are both 18. We have been together for 9 and a half months. The argument was about this rumor that I heard about him. And how a good friend of ours had backstabbed him. I have no idea why he said that he wouldn't tell me. He's not always open with how he feels cuz of things that happened in his past. But he's not a messed up person. He's wonderful and I love him terribly. We have been together too long and been trhu too much to give up. Idk wat else to do to convice him.
Hi again, and thanks for your reply.

You've been together for a long time and I agree that if you feel you belong together, love each other and have been through a lot together, you should try to safe the relationship, but both of you need to want this.

The best thing to do is tell him know how much you care and that you want to stay together because you understand him better than anyone and love him a lot. If he has had a difficult past and doesn't open up easily with people, tell him that he's found it easy to open up with you, more than anyone else, because you understand him and where he's coming from. Keep repeating that he's not a messed up person and he's better when he's with you.

If he said he needs time to think, give him this time, but keep yourself close by and in touch with him, so he realizes how much he needs you, BUT, don't bug him and over text, call, email, etc., so that it becomes a bother to him. Take things slowly, but let him know you'll always be there for him. Wait for him to text you back, but if you don't hear from him by tom'w, then call him to ask how he's doing.
Just don't make it seem like you're pushing him to make a decision.

I wish you much good luck, and hope you get back together.

Cher and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you

Related Relationship Questions