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Cher
Cher, Relationship Enthusiast
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 18509
Experience:  Extensive experience as Educator/Teacher, M.A., Counselor, Spouse, Parent, Psychic Advisor
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What are the chances of getting an ex boyfriend back after

Resolved Question:

What are the chances of getting an ex boyfriend back after you become all emotional and tell them how you feel about the breakup and how sorry you are about everything and that you still love them? What if you do this for about three weeks after the breakup are you considered crazy or emotional? What is the best way to get them to realize that you do love them and that you want to be with them?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Cher replied 5 years ago.
HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on JustAnswer.

Before sending you an answer, it would help to know a little more about your situation.

What are you ages?

How long had you been going out with your boyfriend?

When did you break up and what was the cause of the break up?

What sort of things have you been saying to him and how have you been communicating, with email, by phone, text, etc.?

Please reply as soon as possible so that I can finish answering your question.

Thanks,
Cher



Customer: replied 5 years ago.
I am 26 and he is 28. by text messaging. We have been going out for a year the break up was may 18th. He is not sure about what he wants. I have told him how I feel about him and how sad I am. things that make me sound needy and crazy. lol. I know I shouldn't have told him anything but I did and I regret it.
Expert:  Cher replied 5 years ago.
Hi again, and thanks for your reply.

I understand what you're going through and no, you're not crazy or needy; you've been hurt and you need to express your emotions, there's nothing wrong with that. However, considering the circumstances, you do need to hold back, let things settle, allow him to make up his mind where he wants this relationship to go, and since you've already made him aware of your feelings (and thensome! : )), it would be best if you didn't communicate with him for a few days, unless he initiates contact.

If you don't text him or communicate in any way, you'll be giving him his space, which he requested, and won't continue to show your 'needy' side.

Don't regret what you've already done, because it's done and you can't take it back; don't stress yourself out further, by playing the 'shoulda, woulda, coulda' game with yourself.

If he's not sure what he wants and needs time to sort things out, give it to him, and you start making future plans for yourself, as well. It's always hard and it always hurts, when we break up with someone we love, but sometimes, things happen for a reason, and if you should happen to not get back together with him, use this relationship as a learning experience, and move on. You'll start meeting new people, and reflect back on this as a love you were glad to experience, but if you don't get back together, it's not because of anything wrong you've done, it just wasn't meant to be.

Make a list of pros and cons regarding this relationship and see where you and he could have done things differently, then bring that information to your future relationships, and that will make them better. If you recognize traits in yourself which you feel may have put him off, slowly try to change those behaviors and/or develop new coping strategies that will help now, and in other relationships.

When you find yourself thinking about him and getting upset, distract yourself with another activity; put your energy into something that needs to be done around the house, at work, etc. Also, as I mentioned, try your best to NOT communicate with him for at least 2 days, and this may make him think: 'wow, I wonder what SHE'S doing?!'

I hope things work out for you, and keep reminding yourself not to wear your heart on your sleeve; show him a stronger side of you, now.

Cher
Cher, Relationship Enthusiast
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 18509
Experience: Extensive experience as Educator/Teacher, M.A., Counselor, Spouse, Parent, Psychic Advisor
Cher and 2 other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Thank you so much for your answer.
Expert:  Cher replied 5 years ago.
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