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KimberlyF
KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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I am engaged to be married in less than a month and a half.

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I am engaged to be married in less than a month and a half. My fiance is a wonderful person and we have been dating for over three years now. However, I'm starting to wonder if I am ready to get married yet. My fiance and I live in North Carolina but the wedding is back in my home town. I am back home for a few weeks for final appointments. While being here, I have been hanging out with several friends. One in particular we will call "Rob". Rob and I dated several years ago for a short time. I ended up breaking things off since I had just gotten out of a long-term relationship not too long before. Well, since I have been hanging out with Rob again lately, it is starting to feel like I may have feelings for him (moreso than just friendship). He seems to be attracted to me as well. This is really starting to bother me. I can't eat, sleep, and have been depressed for quite awhile now. However, everything is booked for the wedding and it feels like it is too late for me to back out.Advice?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 5 years ago.
Customer

 

It's important for you to figure out if you are truly having second thoughts or just cold feet many couples get cold feet and fear when the wedding is getting close. You have to be honest about your feelings because this could make or break whether you get married or not. You have to think what if you call off your wedding and then find out that this guy is not the one for you and then you lose your fiance and are alone, could it possibly be that he wants what he cannot have or is he truly liking you and wants to start a relationship with you. This is going to be a hard decision because you don't want to look back years down the line and realize that you made a huge mistake. What you are going to have to do is consider if Rob is the relationship type or does he like to date around with many women, also are you truly in love with your fiance and want to spend the rest of your life with him and have children with him. You should never marry anyone when you have genuine second thoughts about the relationship. If you go into a marriage misery then more than likely the marriage is going to be misery and ultimately end in divorce. I think you are just having second thoughts because you are afraid of the commitment that comes with marriage. When it get closer to the date often time couples start thinking, "Am I doing the right thing by marrying this person?" or "Will this marriage really last" you may be afraid of the unknown that comes with marriage if this is your first marriage or you could be thinking that maybe there is better out there. You are going to have to do some contemplating about it, if you want to be married or do you think that you are not quite ready for that major step it's never too late to change your mind but you will lose alot of money but being sure is better than paying for a divorce later.

KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience: Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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