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KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with
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My wife is extremely demeaning and is not affectionate at all.

Resolved Question:

My wife is extremely demeaning and is not affectionate at all. I have given up all of my dreams for this relationship but I honestly hold no resentment. I just can't figure out why she is so mean. Can you help?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.

HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on JustAnswer. By the way, it would help us to know:


-How long have you been married?


-How long has she treated you this way?


-Do you want to save your marriage?

-Could you explain your situation a little more?

Thank you again for trusting us with your problem. Please reply as soon as possible so that we can finish answering your question.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.

We have been married for 12 years. A little background on her. She had an uncle that apparently abused her when she was little. She also claims she was raped right before we met although I have found inconsistencies in her story. We have a 12 year old daughter and I can honestly say that she is the only reason that I'm still here. What makes it hard is that she is starting to try and run over me just like her mother does. It is heartbreaking and for the first time in my 45 years, I don,t know what to do.


Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.


It's crucial that your wife get into some type of counseling if that is an option because of her past abuse she is making and has made you her sounding board and it's not healthy for your relationship let alone you daughter to see this happening because she will copy what her mother is doing and is already exhibiting such behavior, I would start your wife into counseling and then marriage counseling and then family counseling this may be the only thing to save you marriage before it ends up in divorce. It's at the point that you can no longer endure the demeaning and demanding attitudes of your wife and if your daughter is starting to exhibit those same types of behaviors then it's time to nip it in the bud before it gets out of hand. If she is not willing to seek counseling then you need to talk things out with her and ask her what you can do to help ease the pain of the past before it destroys your marriage if she knows you are at that point she may try harder to work with you but I truly think that counseling for the family is very much needed for this family to last and stay a united front.

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