replied 8 years ago.
I was miserable at my new store where I was working at because I didn't see him as much and I was homesick, don't get me wrong, he would text me every day to check on me and see how I was doing and we would talk for a little while. and every other weekend we would go out, talk, laugh and have fun together, I spent a lot of time with his son because his daughter was always at her moms house, they both live with him and his sons mother lives there too but they're not together, she pays him rent and he lets her boyfriend come over whenever she wants him to. things have changed a lot, my hours were cut at work, so, I'm having to worry about how I'm going to pay rent every month now, he thinks I have a huge problem about him spending time with his kids and not with me when I don't, he's done told me his daughters his world and they're gonna come first, I told him I understand I respected that and I loved the kids but he still didn't believe me.
now, he never texts me anymore, I have to text or call him, he works crazy long hours at this store he's at in his hometown and he only has 1 day off which is sunday and I'm sure this is his weekend to watch the kids while his sons mother goes out and I won't get to see him since its fathers day weekend, but its been 3 days since I've seen him, he used to tell me I could come up to where he worked at to see him but it could only be for 15 minutes because he didn't want the other employees thinking that just because he's doing it that its ok for them to bring their boyfriends or girlfriends to where they work at and letting them stay.
I understood that, but now he doesn't want me coming up there at all, I don't know if its some I said or something I done but he won't tell me, every time I try to talk to him about what's wrong, he instantly goes into his defensive protective mode and thinks I'm pissed off at him because he went to go pick up his kids and left me somewhere stranded (I don't have a car), and thats what happened when I last heard from him which was wednesday, he hurt me so bad that I told him I was gonna call him later but I didn't because I was mad at him for the way he talked to me, I had went up to his work to see him and he told me before he didn't want me doing that anymore, and he had gotten to a point to where he wouldn't answer my text messages anymore but he would answer everybody else's even if he was a little busy, and I went to the mall across the road, and he always picks me up from there and brings me home usually, this time he went straight home after he got off from work and left me there without a way home and I sent him a text message telling him he was acting funny, and he said what do you mean, and I had gotten him a shirt from a store when I was in there and I told him you know what I mean I got you something, and he said I don't know what you mean, I can't just blow off my kids to go f**k around, and I told him that wasn't what I was talking about and I just wanted to ask him something because I was going home for a few days and he just said, my parents watch my kids for me for free and they expect me to be there ASAP when I get off from work to pick them up.
he was lying, he's been late to pick them up before when he takes me home or has something else to do, I don't know if I should just break up with him or try to talk to him about this because he said that if he didn't want anything else to do with me he would tell me, he wouldn't go behind my back and tell someone else that, this is going to sound pathetic, but I've had to get my mom or a friend of mine to call him or text him to get him to call me when I'm worried about him or when I get paranoid because I haven't heard from him in like a day at the least, he won't even return my phone calls if I call him at night and he's asleep, I know I have more time on my hands now to make plans for us to see each other but I've had to do all the asking out except for probably 3 or 4 times when he asked, and it used to only take him 2 to probably 5 minutes to say something back to my text messages, now it takes him 30 or sometimes he doesn't answer them at all, and he knows what he's doing is wrong because his neighbor works with him and when me and those 2 were together he told him that and that he should treat me better and he didn't do anything but laugh because he said he just thought he was trying to start trouble, every time I try to talk to him about this he brings up something else that he has to do or calls someone he wants to talk to and avoids it, either that or he uses the I can't help it I have kids line because he knows thats the easy way out of it.
my question is, how do I bring this up to him without trying to make it sound like the kids are a problem because they're not? and I've called him, probably 2 or 3 times once and he didn't answer the phone and he didn't call me back, he says it was because he was drunk, I have to call him or get someone else to tell him to answer my phone calls, so, he's gotten to the point to where he's impossible to get ahold of, I've called his work and talked to him a few times, the last time I tried that, he told the girl that answers the phone to tell me he's busy. I may have said a few things about myself that his daughter did, said, or something like that that he didn't like, but he's only been acting like this because he was addicted to these prescription pain pills called lortabs, he ate them like they were candy, those and vicodins and oxycodone, he's been doing that for a long time, over 8 years and when he went on his vacation with his family, he tried getting off of them and he wouldn't hardly talk to me, or nothing, wednesday when I seen him he says he done a bad thing and went on a drug binge, it just seems like that the sean I knew and loved and the one that cared about me was the one that was high and on drugs all the time, he told me he wasn't as social when he wasn't on those pills and he wasn't a people person with or without them, I done a bad thing also, I bought them for him and gave them to him, sometimes I felt like that was the only reason he was keeping me around was so that he could get free drugs whenever he wanted because he never offered to pay me back for them, and those things cost $5 a pill and I would go out and buy him 10 or 15 at a time when I knew better, I don't know why I done it, I guess so I could keep him around, if the only reason he wants to keep me around is because he knows I can get those for him for free then I would rather him not have anything to do with me at all, before he left on his vacation he told me not to get him anymore, no matter how much he begged or pleaded with me, I promised him I wouldn't, and I haven't so far. the point I'm trying to make is that, ever since he stopped taking those pills, it seems like he doesn't have a use for me anymore.....