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Cher
Cher, Relationship Enthusiast
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 18967
Experience:  Extensive experience as Educator/Teacher, M.A., Counselor, Spouse, Parent, Psychic Advisor
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I need advice...my husband lied many times in our short 5 year

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I need advice...my husband lied many times in our short 5 year marriage... I am deeply disappointed in him...the first that I found out about was a girl who was in town the week of our wedding- who turned out to be an old girlfriend- he lied repeatedly for a year about it=despite me asking, the next was an employee who he helped out financially by providing a down payment of $3000 for a beach home rental/& supplementing her rent each month for two yrs and putting the lease in the company name/he is the general manager of his business...I am having a difficult time trusting him...as there is no reasonable explanation for this...and he stopped having sex with me after we married with the exception of a few times a year...I am fit, attractive, successful, friendly & loving...but was a single mom when we met...my son was six years old when we married...Soon after we married, he seemed to have a chip on his shoulder regarding becoming a parent to my son - ...can this be saved? He had a previous (undisclosed) addiction to online porn..
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Cher replied 5 years ago.
Hello, and thanks for your question.

I'll be honest with you, from your description of his past deeds, I don't think there is much hope for the success of this marriage. If he was initially apprehensive about becoming a step-parent, he should have considered this fact more carefully, before asking you to marry him. He knew you and your son came as a 'package', so if he felt he either didn't want to take on parental responsibilities or he didn't 'know' how to be a parent, he should not be carrying around a chip on his shoulder regarding this situation, and making you miserable. No one forced him to marry you, knowing you had a son and he would expect to act as a parent to him.

You are too good a person to devote your life to this man, who has lied to you many times in your 5 years of marriage, denies you a good sex life, and doesn't seem to want to be a parent.

I never like to say, this marriage can't be saved, so, if he is willing, your next step should be to seek out a good local marriage counselor to help you work on the problems in your relationship, and if he's willing to put some effort into saving the marriage, tells you he loves you, and seems genuine about this, it's worth a try. If he doesn't seem interested in going to counseling, you'll know the best thing to do for yourself and your son, based upon his past behaviors.

I wish you all the best, XXXXX XXXXX let me know how things are going.

Cher
Cher, Relationship Enthusiast
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 18967
Experience: Extensive experience as Educator/Teacher, M.A., Counselor, Spouse, Parent, Psychic Advisor
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