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KimberlyF
KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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I have been married to my husband for over 28 years. He is

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I have been married to my husband for over 28 years. He is a great guy and I love him very much but . . . he never stops talking. He does nice things for people but can not keep it to himself, he tells everyone, several times. In a social gathering he always has to be the center of attention; he interupts people, talks over them and does not seem to notice or care when they are rolling their eyes at him or trying to get away; it is so embarrassing and makes me feel so sad. We have had many fights about this. Before we go out, I always beg him not to talk too much, etc. He always agrees but breaks his promise the minute he gets around people. I have stopped inviting friends over, and do not attend social activities unless there is no way to get out of it. My neices college graduation/party is coming up, I am dreading it. I feel very angry and am at the end of my rope.
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.

HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on JustAnswer. By the way, it would help us to know:

 

-What was his childhood like? Did he get enough attention for his parents?

 

-Did you consider counseling?


Thank you again for trusting us with your problem. Please reply as soon as possible so that we can finish answering your question.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
He was the youngest of 4 children (two of his brother's are gay). His dad was an alcoholic until he was 16. His mother was very talkative also.

We have been to couples counseling about 10 years ago for a different reason but the taling was brought up. There was never any conclusion.

It seems to be almost compulsive.
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.
Customer

 

Some character traits are inherited but it can also be a learned behavior from trying to get attention because of having older siblings. It may be a compulsive behavior that he may not be able to control. It's important that he go to counseling for this alone so that he won't find himself having to fight for the counselor's attention. He had to deal with alot as a child and this could be in part why he talks too much it could be a nervous condition also but his Doctor will have to diagnose it. I would both ask him to start counseling and visit his Doctor to see why he does this the Doctor could possibly give him medicine for it, there is such a thing as Adult ADD but I'm not a health expert so I don't know what symptoms come with that. It's important to get him diagnosed.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
I have tried to get him to go to counseling, he has refused.
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.
Customer

 

Would he at least go to the Doctor and ask him about it and maybe he can diagnose it for him. He has to do something if it is that embarrassing for you, you want to find out why he does this. If it is something he can correct he should want to do whatever it takes to get the help and enhance your relationship and then you will be able to socialize with other people without interrupting them or talking over them.

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