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Cher
Cher, Relationship Enthusiast
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 21259
Experience:  Extensive experience as Educator/Teacher, M.A., Counselor, Spouse, Parent, Psychic Advisor
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Hi , i woulk like to ask you-because my husband told me that

Resolved Question:

Hi , i woulk like to ask you-because my husband told me that i do not know hoe to behave myself around people, i do not know how to dress, put make up-and emberass him infront of his friends. And i feel a little bit confuse-because i have a lot of friends and nobadu told me that before. I am only child and when i was young my mum got sick-and that really affect me. But people i met in my life told me that i am wondatrfl person---now my husband tells me that my behaviour embress him-and i love him so much, i do not want him to be ashame of me. We are married from 2 months and mmy hsband is Big Boss-so for him is very important the woman to him to be respectful too. But Everytime when we are around people i make such stupied mistake-and for 3-rd time he told me that he want me to leave the house. This morning he told me even that he is not sure any more about us. End i love him so much. Sometimes becaus eof his job-he screams a lot-but i understand that is baceuse of the stresful job-Please hepl me, I love him so much- do not wnat to loose him
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Cher replied 8 years ago.
Hello, Krissy.

I'm sorry to hear you're having this problem with your husband.

It sounds like he's being very hard on you, and if there are behaviors he doesn't like about you and behaviors you don't like about him, you need to discuss them, together. It might be a good idea to go to a marriage counselor together, to help you straighten out some of the things that are occurring in your marriage, so that you can both explain your feelings with a professional there, to help you sort it out.

Because you had the responsibility of taking care of your sick mum, you may feel you were not allowed to experience several relationships before you met your husband, and you have missed out on learning the necessary things to maintain a good relationship with a man. However, the way you describe your husband treating you and the things he says to you are really quite disturbing and mean. If he loves you, he should not say these things to you, and you should not feel guilty at your actions. You deserve equal respect in this relationship, and if he didn't like the way you dressed, put on make-up, spoke, or treated him, why did he marry you? He obviously loves you and wants to be with you, or he wouldn't have married you; you did not CHANGE in the few months you've been married. You're still the same woman.

It sounds like he's confused as to what HE wants, and is taking it out on you.

You need to talk out your problems with a professional counselor, so you can find out if this marriage is salvageable or not. He should not threaten to throw you out of the house, if you are married and this is your house, as well.

I feel it's important for you to get to the bottom of this problem he seems to have with you, and you also need to stop feeling that everything you do is wrong, and stop feeling guilty. You love him very much, but he is not treating you well, and HE should feel guilty for the things he's saying to you.

I hope you're able to find a marriage or couples counselor to help you get your marriage back on the right track.

I wish you much good luck!

Cher
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