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KimberlyF
KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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CAN MY GIRLFRIENDS HUSBAND BE VERBALLY ABUSIVE AND NOT KNOW HE IS SAYING IT

This answer was rated:

VERBAL COMMENTS I DID NOT KNOW HOW UGLY SHE WAS, I DON'T KNOW WHY I MARRIED HER?

HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on JustAnswer. By the way, it would help us to know:

 

-Are you talking about your wife or husband?

 

-How long have you been married?


-Could you explain your situation a little more?

Thank you again for trusting us with your problem. Please reply as soon as possible so that we can finish answering your question.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
IT IS MY FRIENDS HUSBAND, HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR A YEAR. HE HAS BEEN MAKING VERBAL COMMENTS EVEN BEFORE SHE WAS MARRIED, THE SITUATION SHE IS IN HE SAYS I WOULD NEVER MAKE COMMENTS LIKE IT. THAT HE LOVES HER AND HE NEVER MEANS TO HURT HER.COULD HE BE SAYING THESE THINGS WITHOUT KNOWING IT?
Customer

 

It could be he doesn't know that what he is saying is hurting his wife's feelings, your friend will have to tell him that he is hurting her but if he was saying things like that before the marriage he may just be used to saying it that way because your friend has not told him to stop. It seems to be a learned behavior either from childhood or just because your friend has put up with it so long that he got used to talking to her that way. If she wants things to change she has to tell him to stop talking to her in that manner or else, if he hears the "or else" he will know that your friend is truly serious about wanting it to stop and stop now. He will only treat her the way she allows him to treat her and as long as she is willing to put up with it so if she is fed up she has to put a stop to it NOW.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
IS THESE VERBAL COMMENTS DONE INTENTIONALLY?
Customer

 

Yes it sounds like it is if he has been doing it for some time now, you said before they got married then he has to know by now his words are hurting his wife.

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