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Cher
Cher, Relationship Enthusiast
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 18510
Experience:  Extensive experience as Educator/Teacher, M.A., Counselor, Spouse, Parent, Psychic Advisor
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I just moved out of my boyfriends house. We had been dating

Resolved Question:

I just moved out of my boyfriend's house. We had been dating for almost 2 years and after finding out he had abused drugs and overall trust issues. At the end of Nov and early Dec things were at there worst and I began a relationship with a coworker. I ended it w/in a month and because I realized that I would never love him. When I made the decision to leave my boyfriend I was stuck and I felt like I had no where to go. My same co worker had an extra room and the rent was cheap and he said that I could stay there strictly as roommates. This is not the case. He was hoping my moving in would change my feelings and we could be together. I have remained in contact with my ex and we are still intimate. I swear I thought I saw my coworkers car drive around my ex's house today. I asked him but he said no. My ex asked me if there was more than friendship with this guy and I told him no. But now I have to leave and I know that the option to move back with my ex is not there. I'm screwed.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Cher replied 5 years ago.
Hi, and thanks for your question.

For how long have you not lived with your ex?

Did you officially break up around December, as you mentioned things were going downhill?

Is he still abusing drugs?

How often do you see him? Are you intimate every time you're together?

Thanks,
Cher
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
It has only been about 3 weeks since I moved out. No, I don't think he is abusing drugs anymore, he went to rehab at the beginning of January. (But how can you ever know for sure?) No we were not officially broken up then, but I had one foot out the door. I actually ended the relationship with my coworker before I found out about his addiction. I've seen him for the past two weekends and yes, we are intimate every time.
Expert:  Cher replied 5 years ago.
Hello again, and thanks for your reply.

I'm glad to hear that he went to rehab, and hopefully, he's able to stay clean. Of course that would be best for himself and for you, if you want to continue your relationship.

At this particular time, it would be nice if you could continue to see him (your boyfriend), if this is what you want, but you'll need to find your own place to stay or a female friend or relative who can put you up for a temporary period of time, until you can find your own place. I don't think it would be a good idea to move back in with your boyfriend and I completely agree with you and think it's a very smart move, to move out of your co-worker's place and put an end to that intimate relationship. While it's true that it takes two to tango, your co-worker really took advantage of you, saying you could live as roommates, when he had other intentions.

Your best course of action would be to find an inexpensive room to rent in a reputable person's house, or as I mentioned, stay with a friend or relative until you can find something you can afford.

Take things slowly with your ex and see how it goes, but try your best not to fall into old habits, because it's 'convenient', okay?

I wish you much good luck and hope things work out well for you.

Cher
Cher, Relationship Enthusiast
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 18510
Experience: Extensive experience as Educator/Teacher, M.A., Counselor, Spouse, Parent, Psychic Advisor
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