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KimberlyF
KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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My girlfriend has just become my ex-girlfriend as we have been

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My girlfriend has just become my ex-girlfriend as we have been apart for a month. I had confided in her mum who wanted us to get back but her mother inadvertently confided in my ex. She then finished it with me. she had still loved me but no longer is oin love with me. I don't know the best way to get her back, I've heard I should NOT text her and she will eventually text me. I'm going crazy as I'm really hurting at the moment. We have had a five week break should I leave her to miss me and what should i do to potentially get her back?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 5 years ago.

HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on JustAnswer. By the way, it would help us to know:

 

-What are your ages?

 

-How long have you been dating?

 

-What was the main reason for the breakup?

Thank you again for trusting us with your problem. Please reply as soon as possible so that we can finish answering your question.

Customer: replied 5 years ago.

Hi

I am 44 and she is 41, We had been together for just over 2 years. I believe it was the fact I had got a little jealous recently and because of the lack of attention.

Expert:  KimberlyF replied 5 years ago.
Customer

 

You are going to have to give her time and I now that is something you don't want to do but you have to give it enough time to prove to her that you are willing to change your jealous ways, she pretty much got sick of the lack of faith you had in her and it must have become overwhelming for her. I think the thing that really made her decision for her was when you spoke to her mother about the relationship and in turn her mother probably talked to her or scolded her about what you talked about and now you're going to have to work harder to get her back. That includes no contact unless she makes contact first and give her at least a week of no contact and then call to see how she is doing but do not talk about the relationship at all the first time you call, just get a feel for where her mind is at the time, if she is friendly and sounds happy to hear you then that means that she has missed you but don't get discouraged if she doesn't sound that way at first because she could be upset about you talking to her mother and your jealousy.

 

If you beg and plead it's much more likely to push her further away so stay strong and positive. Not only is it important to prove to her that you can be strong and faithful in the toughest of times of your relationship, but you also need to prove it to yourself. Don't sit at home thinking about the relationship and waiting for her, call your old friends and get out of the house. You need to develop other forms of entertainment in your life. This does not mean you start dating other women date, or even look at the opposite sex. It simply means you need to occupy your time with friends and/or hobbies and learn who you are again. There was a reason that you and your ex were initially attracted to each other, and you have to find out what that was and win her back through what attracted her to you in the first place. Sometimes relationships can become old and stale and you can forget what it was that made both of you compatible. Don't just sit around forever and wait for her bu give it some time and if time doesn't bring her back then you will have to start the process of finding closure within the relationship in order to move on.

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
She has said it's over now, I believe because of me contacting her family and them doing likewise. I still have her rent cards etc so she'll need to contact me within two weeks. The majority of my clothes are at her house also. She has also said she wouldn't want anyone else if not with me she wants to be on her own. I pay for the home phone which is my name and the satellite and she text me saying she confused. I text her i didn't want her to worry and i was worried she worried she text back saying she not worried. Is this a bit of reverse psychology?
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 5 years ago.
Customer

 

No I think she is just being honest about her feelings and in your best interest you should try to be her friend right now and not talk about the friendship to earn her love back if she sees that you are capable of change she may be more likely to give you another chance but it may be a long process, you both have alot of unresolved feelings and are tied up in each others lives so you're going to have to communicate alot about things that you still have in the relationship and what you're going to do with those things and the phone bill. Just for now try to stay off of the subject of the relationship unless she brings it up and if she wants to talk about it make sure to hear her out. You will definitely have to start out being friends if there is any hopes of saving or getting the relationship back.

KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience: Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
KimberlyF and 2 other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
I love her very much so will staying away make her miss me anymore?
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 5 years ago.
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