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KimberlyF
KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
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My boyfriends ex fling (not really a girlfriend) and he text

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My boyfriend's ex fling (not really a girlfriend) and he text and instant message each other sometimes. I am fine with that and that they still remain friends as I am still friends with a couple of my ex's although I don't IM them and text them. I read an IM that my boyfriend wrote to her and he asked her if she ever thought about the time the spent together and once he told her how he couldn't figure that she couldn't get a boyfriend because of how pretty she was and how good in bed she was. In her defense, she kinda blew off the questions and never said anything to disrespect me. He has always been very out in the open about what he does. He doesn't hide it or lock his phone. I am just concerned. I don't think he is cheating but I am confused. I would never talk to an ex that way. It makes me wonder that if she were to show an interest in hooking back up with him if he would do it.
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You have to voice your concerns to him and let him know that the way he talks to her bothers you because you would never do that to him. He may be doing it because you allow him to you have to set boundaries when it comes to your mate and their exes though it doesn't bother you to the point you don't think he is cheating why take that chance that later down the line that won't happen because he may take your trust as you not caring and you don't want to come off like that. Talk to him and explain to him though you don't care that he takes to her and remains friends with her you do care about some of the things he has said to her about the past and thoughts about the relationship, that is crossing the line and he has to know that wasn't okay.

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