How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask KimberlyF Your Own Question

KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
KimberlyF is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I am dating a wonderful woman and she wants me to meet her

Resolved Question:

I am dating a wonderful woman and she wants me to meet her children. I am very much in love with her and know I would be crazy about the kids. The problem is that I was not completely honest with her. I told her I was divorced. In actuality, I have been separated for three years and it will be another 3-4 months until the divorce is final (no kids in the divorce). We had already agreed for other reasons it would be 6-8 months before we could consider partnership or marriage. I horribly regret having not been honest and feel I should explain this before I meet her children. I know I must tell her, but don't really know how. It is complicated by the fact that I live in the US and she in England, so it can't be in person. Can you offer any suggestions?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.

HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on JustAnswer. By the way, it would help us to know:


-What are your ages?


-How long have you been dating or talking to this woman?


-Are you serious about being with her?


-Do you think she will be upset about this?

Thank you again for trusting us with your problem. Please reply as soon as possible so that we can finish answering your question.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
Hi Kimberly Ann,

I am 55, she is 45.

We started emailing 4 months ago, have been talking by telephone 1-2 hours a night for about 3 months. Visited her twice and we have great chemistry and comfort with each other. She has told me she loves me and I believe her. I have told her the same and it is true. I am very serious about being with her and have started making plans to relocate to England in the Summer. She has talked with her children about me and I have spoken very briefly with them on the phone (small talk).

I don't know how she will feel about this. I know she has trust issues with her ex-husband.
Customer: replied 7 years ago.
I am sorry for the delay in my reply, but was caught up in a conference call. I must call Natasha soon, due to the time difference, and hope you can give me some further input. Thank you.

Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.



If she already has trust issues from her marriage then don't fuel that fire be honest with her if she loves you she will understand that sometimes divorces take time and as long as you are not living with your wife she will understand. You have to tell her the truth before you make plans to meet her children because she may change her mind about you meeting them until you are legally divorced, give her the choice of whether or not to allow you to meet her children now. I think she would appreciate the truth more than you not telling her something that important. Allow her to decide as to what to do from there leave it totally up to her and tell her that you understand her concerns and that you have no feelings for your wife it's just a legality that is taking longer than you had hoped it would. It would be better to tell her in person but since you are an ocean away maybe the next time you talk to her on the phone and are completely comfortable telling her let her know then but make sure you do it when you are ready to tell her emotionally. Once you tell her or if you decide to tell her hear her out about how she is feeling after you tell her this will show that you truly do care about how she feels and just want to go into the relationship without any secrets.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
What do you mean to make sure I tell her when I am ready to tell her emotionally? I feel that I have to tell her without any more delay and am worried sick. I don't know what the best time is for me to tell her. Are you saying I should wait until I am less upset about this?
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.


I meant that you don't know what her reaction will be and you don't know if she will want to slow things down until you are legally divorced and not allow you to meet her children and that is what I meant by being emotionally ready for her reactions to the news that even though you are separated and no longer together you are still legally married. I think you should tell her within a reasonable time frame and not wait until you are ready to meet her children this will upset her to know that she was introducing a married man top her children and you don't want to take that chance. It's best to tell her the truth but it's up to you to know when that time is.

KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience: Relationship expert for almost three years with
KimberlyF and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Previous | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX

Meet The Experts:

  • Kate McCoy

    Kate McCoy


    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
< Last | Next >
  • Kate McCoy's Avatar

    Kate McCoy


    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist


    Satisfied Customers:

    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • Ms Chase's Avatar

    Ms Chase

    Life Coach

    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
  • Alicia_MSW's Avatar



    Satisfied Customers:

    Specializing in relationship/family counseling
  • Dr. Norman Brown's Avatar

    Dr. Norman Brown

    Marriage Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    Family Therapist & teacher 35+ yrs; PhD research in couples
  • Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L


    Satisfied Customers:

    Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
  • Suzanne's Avatar


    Therapist, LCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency

Related Relationship Questions