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Kate McCoy
Kate McCoy, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1555
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
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My family arent speaking to me and although i have tried to

Customer Question

My family aren't speaking to me and although i have tried to make amends they all say its too late. I haven't done anything wrong but they think I have. I've apologised anyway, even though I didn't think I needed to. How can I get them to speak to me and understand how I feel?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 5 years ago.
Hello Sarah

What did you do or what are they accusing you of doing?

Who in your family is doing this?

What is your age?

Chase
Customer: replied 5 years ago.

My daughter is suffering with an eating disorder, and my family blame me for it, or at least blame me for not noticing as I should have done. There have been a few heated discussions via the telephone and they have accused me of being a bad mother.

 

I don't think I am - I think things could have been better but I was trying the best way I knew how. My family were not around and didn't help at the time either.

 

I'm in my early 30s.

 

The family members that are doing this are my mother, father and sister. My brother is opting to stay out of it, and that is all the family I have.

Expert:  Ms Chase replied 5 years ago.
Hello Sarah,

Can you explain the situation to me a little more?

How old is your daughter?

What type of eating disorder? Did you know about it? How did you/they find out about it?

Your daughter lives with you?

How far do you live from your parents?

How has your relationship been with them in the past?

Chase
Customer: replied 5 years ago.

My daughter is 13.

 

She doesnt eat. I did know and we were trying to deal with it with support from GP. It has been ongoing for a year.

 

No, she lives elsewhere for the past few months (since the family broke up with me).

 

About 70 miles away.

 

Rocky with my mother but solid and close with the rest

Expert:  Ms Chase replied 5 years ago.
I guess my question is what else did they expect you to do?

What do they think you should have done?

When they say it's too late, it's too late for what?

Chase
Customer: replied 5 years ago.

I have no idea what they expected me to do.

 

My father was very angry he did not know what was going on, so I think that might be his issue.

 

However with my sister and my mum I think the feel guilty for not being around because they live far away. I suppose they think they could have managed the situation better than me and perhaps they could. My mother has said I am a bad mother.

 

I asked my father to ring me because I wanted to try to make up with him and he told me it was too late to make up.

 

I'm at a loss what to do now,

Expert:  Ms Chase replied 5 years ago.
Where is your daughter staying now?

Do you think they are overreacting? Why are they this angry?

Did your daughter get taken away? Where's her father?

Do your parents see your daughter and you often before this?

Do you think you're a bad mother?

Chase

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Kate McCoy
Kate McCoy
Counselor
1555 Satisfied Customers
Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues