Mike left home when he was 17 to follow his girlfriend (that he is married to now) back to Georgia and did not graduate from high school. Bob has encouraged him to go back to school for as long as I have known him. Yes, Bob has tried to talk with Mike and asked him many times why he thinks he was not a good dad. All Mike can say is that he was never there for him! Mikes mother divorced Bob when he was 8 years of age and ran off with another man. At 12 years of age she dumped him on Bob because she couldn't handle him. Bob found it hard to be involved with him for those 4 years (between 8 & 12 years) because she moved 400 miles away. She is divorced again, and is now openly gay and living with a significant other.
This conversation took place after he sent me a nasty letter to read that he was sending to his "gay" mother. I never placed blame, or spoke badly of his mother because it is not my place no matter how I feel. During the conversation he started bad mouthing his dad and told me his parents used to fight, but never over him and his dad was never home (24 hrs on/ 3 days off) at the fire station. Then he said it was all his dads fault that he never went to college. I then said, boo hoo Mike, I raised my own 2 boys alone, worked 2 and 3 jobs, went to college and held a full time job for over 10 years. Now, my question to him was ,"How can you place the blame on him for your own mistakes?" This was not the first time Michael confronted me or Bob about this same thing.
I have called Mike's wife more than once but she won't return my phone calls. Shannon is bipolar and very difficult to talk with. The only time Mike has called us in the past 3 years is when Shannon is not taking her meds and he can't deal with her. I'm tired of the hurt he is causing Bob.