Can I ask you one more question about the abuse:
-Was any of the abuse sexual abuse?
I think it was a mixture of feelings going on there with her not wanting him to touch her, part of that feeling was the fact that she finally realized it was wrong and that he was a friend's husband and partly because of the abuse (all aspects of the abuse) made her flash back to the way she felt when she was getting abused, when a person doesn't realize why they were abuse and the fact that the abuser was a sick person with mental issues they will always blame themselves and have flashbacks about the abuse especially when they are in a relationship with someone that isn't good for them or isn't totally theirs, when she started realizing what she was doing it made her feel almost as invaded as the sexual abuse and when she wanted it to stop he couldn't understand that because she had accepted so long with him. She confused that situation with the friend's husband with the situation with her sexual abuse. This is why she really needs to seek counseling to help her sort out all of these feelings, if she is going to be good for someone else she HAS to feel good about herself.