I would be happy to help you think through this situation. Please answer these questions for me first so that I can better answer your question.
What are your ages?
Have you ever been in a long distance relationship before?
Does he still have contact with this other woman?
Does he say what he is "confused" about?
Have you talked with him about marriage before?
What do you want out of this relationship?
It sounds like you are in a very tricky situation. If you keep your heart invested in this relationship, you are running the risk of being hurt very badly. There is a discrepancy between what he is telling you and how he is behaving when around you. He claims to be "confused" but acts "affectionately" with you. He is sending you what is called a "double message." That is, he is telling you to draw close with his behavior but his words are expressing something contrary. The tricky thing about long distance relationships is that they foster a false sense of closeness and connectedness. That is, they make you believe that you are perfect for each other because when you talk to or see one another, it is usually to share positive feelings and experiences. Long distance relationships can build a false sense of security and closeness. Men tend to require close physical contact to feel connected in relationships. When you are apart for that long, it usually results in wandering eyes on the man's part. He probably noticed this other woman and was intrigued by the attention she gave him. Although you attempted to give him attention over the phone or in a few intimate meetings, he was likely looking for female attention.
I would suggest that the two of you sit down in your next visit and have a very serious conversation about the future of this relationship. It is wrong of him to keep you hanging on for all of this time. If you are, in fact, no longer together...you should not be talking to him every day or going to see him at all. You are continuing to put up with this treatment because he is giving you some love and attention that you desperately crave. Search inside yourself as to the reasons why you need this man's attention and affection. His behavior seems very unstable and it is likely that he is struggling to understand what he wants out of his life. At his age, he may be struggling with mid life crisis issues. Although there is nothing wrong with dating a man that is this much older, it may cause you a number of problems that you aren't even aware of yet. You are young...you should not let this man and his confusion keep you on a leash. He needs to "man up" and make a decision about his future. He is not 16 years old. As an adult, he owes you decent and honest response. As long as you continue to talk to him every day and go to see him on occasion, he has no reason to make a commitment to you. You are helping him stay in a state of confusion by allowing him to suck you dry without giving you a real commitment in return. I'm guessing you probably feel pretty empty inside and thinking of him makes you feel better. You are worth more than this!!! Let him know that you need a real answer from him. Keeping up this pattern of interaction is very unhealthy and may lead to a lot of regret on your part. You deserve an answer from this man! Go and get one already. You can do it!
If you found this answer helpful, please click accept so that I get credit for my work. Bonuses are appreciated. I would be happy to help you with any follow-up questions. Please feel free to request me again if you have future questions. Good luck to you!