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KimberlyF
KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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How can I let him know I respect him and love him

Resolved Question:

I have been in a semi-relationship (its complicated) with a guy for about 1 and 3 months. He and I get along on most things, but I have messed up two times - once I lied to him about hanging out this this other guy and the other was that I called his work 5 times in a period of 15 minutes. For the first situation - I did not have a relationship with this person. The guy wanted to, as it turned out...and I eventually had to say that I was not interested. The other situation was over something really petty, and honestly very selfish on my part. All I wanted to do was ensure that he would go with me to a play...instead of by himself or with someone else. So I kept calling and he was in a meeting, with people in his office...so calling him over and over was no good and very thoughtless. Well, after this situation he doesn''t want to see me anymore. I understand the reasons why he should be mad - I lied to him (I have not since), and I potentially messed with his job. I do respect this man, and I love him a lot. How can I let him know this?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 6 years ago.

HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on Just Answer. By the way, it would help me to know:

-What are your ages?

-Did he lose his job over you calling so many times or just got repremanded?

-Are you saying you cheated on him or was just talking to this other guy?

-What do you mean by semi relationship?


Thank you again for trusting me with your problem. Please reply as soon as possible so that I can finish answering your question.

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Reply to KimberlyF's Post: I am 25 and he is 33. No, he didn't lose his job. He just has very strong opinion on things when it comes to his work.

No, I didn't cheat on him. I was just talking - the other guy and I would go running and biking. Occasionally I would sleep at his house b/c he is far.

Scratch the semi-relationship piece. We are in a relationship. We have expressed that we love each other, trust each other, etc.

Thank you in advance
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 6 years ago.
Customer

The only way you are going to get him to realize how you feel about him and how intense those feelings are is to tell him these things, sit him down and tell him all of the mistake you have made and the way you are trying to change them. You calling his work was probably the straw the broke the camels back because it is important for him to look good especially at work and getting a lot of outside phone calls probably made him look like he is a slacker that talks on the phone all the time and it angered him. Tell him that will never happen again and stick by what you say don't lie to him that is partly what makes him so mad. If you can't bring yourself to say it in person then think about buying a card and writing a letter to him expressing your feelings and put it inside the card. Tell him you had realized the mistake you have made and want to be a better person for him.

Maybe he would have had enough time to think about things and realize that breaking up wasn't the right thing to do instead he should have told you the things that made him angry the most and the two of you should have worked on that together. Tell him that you know how important his job is to him and that you will never intrude on that unless it's an emergency and cannot wait, it does seem petty the reason he broke up with you but it's more or less a build up of things and he feels you don't respect his feels in things and he just wants you to be more considerate of what he wants and doesn't want. The relationship is salvageable if you both work at it to make it the relationship you both want and also he need to realize that to err is human and we all make mistakes we wish we could take back but we cannot.

KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience: Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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