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KimberlyF
KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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I found out my husband was cheatingn on me from ...

Customer Question

I found out my husband was cheatingn on me from messages on his cell phone. He omitted he was having an affair and told me she lived out of town.Through some investigating i found out that it wasnt her. he than told me another name and i found out that was also untrue. Are marriage has been doing very well because he is being the perfect husband but i still want to know her name and where shes from. Ifeel i need questions answered to bring closure to this whole mess.Am i wrong for wanting to know who she is?he told me someday he will tell me everything but for now he cant because he feels i will call her.I told him i wouldnt do that if he would just be honest with me but he doesnt believe me. should i end this marriage,
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 6 years ago.

HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on Just Answer. By the way, it would help me to know:

-What are your ages?

-How long have you been married?

-Do you want to stay in the relationship and make it work?

-Why do you want to know her name and where she is from? Is it because you want to make sure he can not see her anymore?

Thank you again for trusting me with your problem. Please reply as soon as possible so that I can finish answering your question.

Customer: replied 6 years ago.

My husband is 54 and i am 51. we have 4 children 24, 23, 21, 19.we have been married 26 years. my husband works out of town alot and i would feel alot more comfortable knowing where she is. I found out about the affair in feb. 2008 and became very depressed not knowing who she was or where she was so he gave me a false name.after 3 months i realized this wasnt true so he told me another name and 3 months later i find out thats not true.I feel in the meantime we have worked on the marriage and we can have alot of fun together,even our sex life has been better. but now im at a place finding out the 2cd person isnt true the lieing is starting to be more hurtful than the affair.I feel he still sharing a bond of secrecy with her.I think Ive waited long enough for the truth it will be almost 6 months and i feel im being dragged trrough the mud. i deserve to know the truth by now, and if he cant trust me enough that i wont call her than maybe we should end the marriage. after all he is the one who made the mistake not me. He will turn the tables though and say to me i thought you loved me enough to wait until i feel its the right time to tell you.

Expert:  KimberlyF replied 6 years ago.
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