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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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I used to go out with a guy years ago, then we both got ...

Customer Question

I used to go out with a guy years ago, then we both got married to different people had kids and now are both separated. We have run into each other in the past few years and actually started dating and then he got cold feet and just quit calling me. Lately, we have hooked up a few times but I stay away so I don't run into him because he and i have alot of chemistry. I am separated and he is divorced so that may have caused a problem. Anyway, his kids like me alot and my kids like him as we have been friends for the last few years. Now, he says he likes me but has not phoned me and yet wants me to do things with him this summer. I am getting all kinds of mixed messages. What do you think>
Submitted: 9 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 9 years ago.

When is the last time he called you?

When did he talk to you about things for the summer?

What kinds of plans?


Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Reply to Ms Chase's Post: About a month ago he said that he wanted to get together in the summer. We would go boating, camping, and he would teach me how to water ski. He tried to give me space a few months ago as i have recently been separated but i wouldn't let him so he decided to now. We have alsways had a fondness for each other for alot of years. He told me a month ago that he liked me a little. Always making a joke about me on his boat this summer. i am not sue how to take him.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 9 years ago.

The only thing you can do is take him at his word. If he said that he would want to get together, then the only way to know if he is telling the truth is to give it time and give him time to stand by his word. People say a lot of things, but it's the things that they do that are more important and show how they really feel. Him saying that he likes you a "little" doesn't sound very good, the best thing is to just take things slow, and see if he moves them in a direction that will put the two of you closer together. The botXXXXX XXXXXne is if someone likes you, you won't have to ask, they will show you that they like you in everything they say, but more importantly in the things that they do. I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more



Customer: replied 9 years ago.
well, I had not seen him for two months and went golfing at the lake with a guy friend and he was there. He was not amused he asked me if this was a new thing..i told him that bill and i were friends..anyways he and i went for a walk and he wanted me to stay with him for the weekend. i told him i had kids and that i couldnt...but now he calls and says call me and when i do he tells me he is busy...and to have a good weekend...mixed messages thats for sure...tell me what yhou think...
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 9 years ago.
Hi Punkie,

He sounds a little controlling. He doesn't see you for two months and then gets upset that you were out with someone? That's your business, you are an adult and certainly don't have to answer to him. The fact that he 'tells' you to call him, shows more controlling issues. He tells you to call him and then blows you off, and this puts him in control. I would say that if you want to be involved with him, proceed with caution as it seems that he is still about playing games. Whether he realizes he is playing games or if this is more of a psychological issue, you will want to stand up for yourself, and just not put up with it. If he tells you to call, there is no reason why you should, because if he's not calling you, then whats the point? I would sit back a little and see if he makes any moves, if not, I would consider moving on.


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