HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on Just Answer. By the way, it would help me to know:
-What are your ages?
-Do you live together?
-What makes you think she is cheating. what proof if any?
-Do you get along for the most part except for the communication?-Could you explain your situation a little more?Thank you again for trusting me with your problem. Please reply as soon as possible so that I can finish answering your question.
If friends are telling you she isn't doing this then maybe you should believe that they are telling you the truth, it seems like she is trying to play mind games with you to make you believe that she is cheating so to get you to do more for her. You are right with the recession it is better that there is two incomes in the household. The only way it seems you can help her is if you pay EVERYTHING and that isn't fair to you and it will only become a habit. You need to ask yourself is all of this worth and if you can honestly answer no then maybe you should think about letting her go and mature. There hardest thing to do is to let someone you love go but it doesn't seem like she is ready for marriage. Tell her that her calling you a Loser bothers you and that you do alot for her and don't deserve that treatment.
If you don't have concrete proof that she is cheating or going to cheat then there isn't anything you can do about that but trust her, she is 31 years old and needs to be more responsible for paying her own bills and buying her own food. If her brother is there why aren't they sharing the bills or do you pay for him also? There are alot of things the two of you need to help on before you even consider marry her. Ask yourself if this is the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with? If she is mentioning cheating then maybe she has thought about it before or is thinking about it and hasn't done it yet or hasn't found the person to do it with, but I believe it is just talk to get a reaction of you and to make you do what she wants to do. Relationship and marriage is 50/50 not 90/10 and if you are not getting that from here then you need to think about what she actually give to the relationship?
Unless you want to pay her and her brothers bills constantly then you need to put your foot down and make her be a responsible ADULT and that is the key word she acts as though she is a child wanting everything in the toy store, make her and her brother be more responsible or they will break you. It sounds as though you are communicating but she isn't willing to it's like it's her way or the highway and that just isn't the way life works, especially with the recession.
It isn't a very healthy relationship for you if she puts you down constantly and says no one else would want you that is an oh so common plea that people say to break another person down so that after a while they will actually believe that they are worth anything and no one would want them, don't allow her to make you feel this way. I would walk away before you get the suit and show her how good she really had it, you can find someone that truly cares about you and your feelings and it's obvious she is self centered and selfish only caring about herself, you don't need a person like that, especially one that puts you down and berates you because she doesn't get what she wants from you. Could you imagine if you married her? That would be a lifetime hell that you would not deserve.
If you have to trap someone in the relationship then the relationship is not worth having anyway and from what you have said she definitely is not worth your time or your money. Ask yourself, what does she give me or what does she bring to the table in this relationship? That is answer is easy NOTHING. You deserve better than this get out while you can and let someone else put up with her antics not you. You love her far more than she loves you and you can give that love to a person that actually deserves it and gives that love back to you.