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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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Would it be safe to stay in a relationship with a guy whom ...

Resolved Question:

Would it be safe to stay in a relationship with a guy whom you have doubts with the depth of his loyalty and feelings for you?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 6 years ago.

Hi Nascent

What are your ages?

How long have you been together?

Why do you have doubts?

Chase

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Reply to Ms Chase's Post: I'm 30 and he's 21. We've only been together for 6 months. I feel he wont' stay with me for long. He and I don't spend a lot of time with each other. He's living and working outside the city, and I have been busy with my job. We only get to keep in touch through chats and SMS. Whenever there's an opportunity we try to meet and spend time with each other. Lately I have doubts as to whether the strength and depth of his feelings for me will overcome our differences in lifestyles and personalities.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 6 years ago.

Hello Nascent

thank you for that additional info.

Was there something that happened recently to make you feel this way?

Whats different now, than say 2 or 4 months ago?

Chase

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Reply to Ms Chase's Post: Four months ago I wasn't serious about the relationship. I was laid back, just seeing how it develops. But 3 months ago my feelings for him changed. There's more emotional investment in it. I don't want to lose him and be hurt again.

I can play the game and not feel anything when my lover and I part, but when emotions are involved, it can not be avoided that one of us will get hurt bad. And I don't want to be that person.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 6 years ago.

Nascent,

Nobody wants to be that person, and thats a fact. Whether or not it's safe to stay in the relationship is a judgment call on your part.

  • Is he good to you
  • does he keep his word
  • is he honest
  • does he respect you
  • when your together is he affectionate
  • does he make a point of contacting you or are you always the one to reach out
  • does he listen when you talk
  • does he take your thoughts and feelings into consideration

Those are all questions you have to ask that can help you gauge whether or not it's worth staying with him. I know that once you start to develop feelings for someone it can be hard to be objective, but the best thing sometimes is to keep that laid back attitude, even when you're not feeling laid back. If he starts feeling like you're moving faster than him, it could chase him away. I don't think that an opposing schedule is enough to call off a relationship if you both know what you want and make an honest effort to spend time together. I welcome your thoughts. Let me know if you want to talk more.

Warmly

Chase

Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience: Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
Ms Chase and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Relist: No answer yet.
I did not get any answer. I have already deposited the 9 dollars you asked using Paypal. I have my Paypal transaction ID here: 6X183501KP549780W. But you did not deliver my answer. Please just give me back my money if you can't give the promised answer. Thank you.

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