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KimberlyF
KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
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I'm half black. Nothing I can do you see... Yet every time I meet a girl her parents have a fit! I just want to be happy like everyone else. I'm in the Air Force. I own my own car and pay all of my own bills. I don't do drugs and I have nothing but the highest respect for women. Yet I'm constantly treated like a stereotypical gang member, drug attic, womanizer. It IS the year 2008 right? Why can't I be happy?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 6 years ago.

HiCustomer Thank you for asking your question on Just Answer. By the way, it would help me to know:

-What is your age?

-Where are you stationed that the parents have such a fit about your being part black?

-Do the girls break up with you because of this?

-Could you explain your situation a little more?

Thank you again for trusting me with your problem. Please reply as soon as possible so that I can finish answering your question.

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Reply to KimberlyF's Post: Im 20 years old. Lol. I'm stationed in Alabama... (go figure right?) The girls usually do break up with me because of the problems their parents have with my race. The most recent being a girl in Georgia. She is white. She is 23 and her parents have her crying because shes talking to me! We still talk on the phone but it's ridiculous. It's like were still in high school sneaking around and everything. I just want to have a NORMAL relationship. I was born in Athens Georgia. I was put into foster care at age 7. The couple kept me, my two sisters and my little brother until we were adopted in 2000. The foster family was black and obviously this molded me more towards that cultural style. Clothes, music, etc. The couple that adopted us are white. Sure enough I began playing guitar and moving more towards that cultural lifestyle. Well now I'm 20 years old and I'm perfectly mixed! One would think that I have the best of both worlds and in some ways I do... Except the relationship aspect. I don't feel that I HAVE to be with a particular race to be happy. I like white girls. Sue me. :)
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 6 years ago.

Jester Thank you for replying to my questions,

There is nothing wrong with you having a preference for white women that is your choice and you know what makes you happy. Maybe you should try proving yourself to their parent and see if that changes their mind and maybe they can see past the way you dress or act or the assumption they have made about you. In any relationship you pretty much have to prove yourself to the family anyways right? What I can't understand is if you are both of age then why should it matter what the parents think? If her parents are making her cry because of you being half black then she should explain to her parents that she doesn't see color and that she sees you for the person you are and maybe this will make her parent take a look at how they are reacting to you.

If you like this girl give it some times and explain to her parents that you care about their daughter and would like to see where this goes and explain to them that you are a nice guy if they would only give you a chance and not make snap judgments about you. You're right you don't have to be with a particular race to be happy just as long as your happy with the person you are with or choose to be with. Maybe you should explain that to her parents. Either way just like with any relationship you have to prove yourself to her and her family. Respect is earned not given! if you give it time and they still don't accept you then you have to ask yourself if it is really worth the trouble and if the answer is yes then you have to keep trying but if the answer is no then I'm sure there is many other white women whose parent will actually give you a chance. Let me know if you still need my help.

KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience: Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com
KimberlyF and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Thank you so much! Respect isn't given. And I WILL earn the respect of her parents by giving it my all. Thank you again. :)
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 6 years ago.

Jester,

You're quite welcome and if you ever need my help again feel free to ask for me by name. Thank you and Good luck!

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KimberlyF
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Relationship expert for almost three years with JustAnswer.com