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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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I have feelings for this girl and weve been friends ...

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I have feelings for this girl and we''ve been friends for 4 months now. we are both in college. She had a boyfriend but now they''ve broken apart from each other for about 3 weeks now and she is pregnant. I still have feelings for her but I don''t know if she has any for me. We have about everything in common. But I hardly have anything to say. I stop being myself when I''m with her. I am so shy when I am around her. She knows that I am a really nice guy literally, but I also have the fear of being rejected. She is so sweet and caring, and she has this kind of beauty that no one can see, but I can see through that. Theres not one day I go without thinking about her. Tell me how can I handle this situation.


What are your ages?

Why did they break up?

What makes you think she won't get back with him?


Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Reply to Ms Chase's Post: We are both 18 in college. I will tell you as much as I know. They broke up because the boyfriend sent her an email saying something horrible about her and maybe how he does not want a child. As soon as she got the message she was crying. But she is back to her old self again. But she wants this child and she said she does not want to associate with her ex again in any way.

I'm going to be frank with you. She may be saying this right now and she may even mean it right now, but with this baby coming she will think about it and its highly possible she will change her mind. Maybe she won't but chances are high that she might because they have a connection now where she will have to deal with this guy for the rest of her life whether she wants to or not. It's not uncommon for a guy to freak out when he finds his girl is pregnant, especially when they are so young, it's also not uncommon for the girl to take offense, break up with him, say she hates him and then forgive him.

I would suggest that if you really care for her, that you be a friend to her first before anything else. The more time you spend with her and the longer you know her and are friends with her, it will eventually become apparent whether she likes you 'like that' or if she just sees you as a friend, and also to see if she will get back with her ex.

Another issues is that she may feel very alone now, and she may cling to you for support, but you want to make sure that if you do get involved with her its for the right reasons and not the wrong, hence why I'm saying that you keep it as friends, until things sort out a little. If she plans on keeping the child, thats a huge responsibility on her, and you if you get involved.

Give it some time. Be yourself, don't always worry about what to do or say, just look at her as a friend and it will be a little easier to be yourself. You want to be yourself because if she does start to like you, you want her to like you for the real you. It's not an easy situation, but if you take things slow, hang back, get to know her and let her get to know you, then you will be able to see the situation a little clearer in a few months.

I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more



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