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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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I was dating this guy, it was a bad break up and we had ...

Resolved Question:

I was dating this guy, it was a bad break up and we had each others property. At first I refused to send his car keys back. He would not send my property (memory card with lots of pictures) until I sent his and vice versa. Now…I''m ready to let go, so I decided to send his keys back, however, he won''t give me the address. Once I learned how to get to his house, I forgot the physical address…why all of a sudden won''t he send me the address to mail his property?
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.

Hello Diva,

Is he communicating with you?

Who broke up with who?

WHy did you split?

How old are the two of you?

Chase

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Reply to Ms Chase's Post: He is not communicating with me. We initially broke up in Feb. 2007. He asked for the committed relationship to end after I caught him cheating. We still carried on as normal, although we were an unofficial couple. In December 2007, he and I got into an altercation which resulted in my digital camera being destryoed and his laptop and two printed being destroyed. He called the police and I was asked to leave the home and never return...which was fine. I am 29 and he is 34. He is a Ghanaian man here on a expired student visa trying to get his green card. As mentioned, the keys I took were his car keys and he has my memory card with all my pictures on it. He has insisted for months that I won't get my memory card until he gets his keys, I insisted the opposite. I have been the one communicating, he has stated "Why are you calling me? I'm not calling you." He also stated that as a result of the last incident I have caused alot of problems and that he is going to get over this and everytime I call, it reminds him of the good and the bad so is therefore a distraction. Even though he hasn't called for the keys, he wants them because when I call for my memory card he states "Where are my keys?" I asked him for the address and he stated "Do you mean to tell me you have all this information but no address?" I said "Once I learned how to get to your house, I forgot the physical address". He then stated "I will mail your memory card back and mail my keys back to the return address on the envelope". I agreed, but have yet to receive the memory card.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.

Hello Diva,

It could be that he's holding onto the memory card as a way of punishing you for what happened. Although he wants his keys he's willing to sacrifice them at the moment to make you feel bad. It could also be that he's using them as a way to keep a link to you, to hold on through good and bad, regardless of how you feel. The simplest reason might be that he, like many other people is a procrastinator and hasn't gotten an envelope, stamp or made it to the post office.

Try reaching out to him and changing tactics, be a little nicer, even though you may not want to be. Let him know that you want to get your pictures and that they are important to you and how much you appreciate him holding on to them for you. Ask if he needs you to send him an envelope and stamp (this way you might be able to get the address).

I hope this helps, let me know if you want to talk more

Chase

Ms Chase and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Reply to Ms Chase's Post: I called yesterday for the status (shouldn't have) and he stated, I mailed them. I told him thank you and that ended our conversation.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.

Why do you say you shouldn't have, at the very least you found out what you needed to know and if he did in fact mail it,then you can send him his keys and move on with your life.

Chase

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