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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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My husband works for a company owned by a friend of mine

Customer Question

My husband consults for company owned by a friend of mine and her husband. This is not his primary employment (thankfully because the company has never been particularly stable) My husband came home horrified that several people have seen Mr. ___ fooling around with clients and Mr. ____'s partner has asked that my husband talk with him and basically ask him to cool it because it is starting to effect clientele and the word is out there that he is kind of a womanizer. The partner asked Mr. ___ to cool it herself but he basically said 'too bad, its personal, thats just the way its going to be'. Partner thinks that guy to guy maybe Mr. ___ will get the message. I only feel for my friend--I could care less about the business--she is a hard working loving mom and I feel that she is being made a fool of. How can I warn her to watch her back. I wish she could resolve this privately and quietly. I would be livid if it were me in the same situation and no one warned me. What to do?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 6 years ago.

Camille,

Since it was something that "several people" have seen, you could always warn her yourself, but you certainly would have to consider the fact that you husband would likely lose his job. You could write an anonymous note and send it to her, perhaps suggest that she consider hiring a private detective to catch him in the act. I don't think your husband should get in the middle of it, guy or no guy.

I welcome your thought, let me know if you want to talk more

Chase

Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience: Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
Ms Chase and 3 other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Thanks. Thats a good idea with the anon letter. I'm afraid to tell her myself because you always hear that you become the hated party. I also don't want my husband to get involved. But....i'm so afraid for my friend. Diseases... divorce (they have a lot of kids)and shes such a good hearted person. the only reason I wonder about the anon letter is because I wouldn't want her to think its some jerk just starting trouble. I would just stay out of it but I would really be hurt if I had a real friend and she didn't try to protect me. Do you think I'm sticking my nose where I shouldn't?
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 6 years ago.

Camille,

There is always the risk that you will lose your friend. Mainly because if she loves him, she wont WANT to believe that it's true and if he flatly denies it and she has no proof them she'll be more inclined to believe him.

You can let her know in the letter that you hesitated to send the letter because you were afraid she would think its a hoax. Urge her not to run to him with the letter but to do her homework, and find out the truth for herself.

You would want to know...I would want to know...but believe it or not, there are some people who would prefer not to know. Sure, some might say that you're sticking your nose in, but in my opinion,as a friend, I wouldn't be able to let it go.

Chase

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Sorry! I replied and hit the accept button but I guess you can't do both? Well, thank you and I know what I have to do-I've got to get the guts to do it.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 6 years ago.
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