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Men & their feelings

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A man I dated for 3 months and I had a falling out one week ago, it was VERY bad. He called to tell me that he was sorry (a week later), and told me that he could not return some of my belongings to me in person. When I asked why, he would only say I can’t. I've given him a letter telling him that I'd like to talk face to face, it bothers me that we ended on a bad note and that he can't see me. In that letter I said if it was because he still had feelings and wouldn't be able to walk away not to.It also went on to say that I am not like the others he has dated, and I'm willing to try and make things work. He has agreed that we need to talk and will be coming to my house to do so. He has also called several times since reading the letter to tell me a joke, or something small (he use to to that daily). My thought is he was unsure about how I felt, thinking he may have messed up with the fight. Now that he knows that isn't the case he is willing to open back up and give this a try. I'm a being a little too positive, thinking this? Is he just coming over to be nice and end things like a man? He said some very mean things to me suring our fight, like I'm not what he wants, he doesn't have time for me, etc....We all say some things we don't mean when we are angry, hopefullly thatw as the case with him.   
Submitted: 12 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  bcexelbi replied 12 years ago.
My recommendation is that you make arrangements to collect you belongings and move on. I understand you need closure, but I suspect that even if you talk to him you will never get it.

If he can't arrange to deliver your belongings to you in person he isn't going to suddenly become very open and talkative either.

Your closure should be moving on and finding the right person to date. If this happens to you a lot, change your criteria, as the old saying goes "If you keep doing what you have always done, you will keep getting what you have always gotten."

bex
Expert:  mattie replied 12 years ago.
everyone deserves a second chance. talk with him about all the things you mentioned and see how you fell after. yes, we all say things when we're angry,but that's not where you want to be,i mean with someone who spouts off their mouth. just be cool now and let things build from a new beginnig. good luck!
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Customer: replied 12 years ago.
Thanks again!!! I have very postive thougths about a possible new beginning. He is a good guy, just needs to know that I am here for him, not against him. That he can't take things out on me becuase of the stress at work, or from previous relationships. I also think that he hasn't learned that not all woman are alike, he is use to being nagged on for EVERYTHING. That isn't something I do at all...Maybe it is the age difference in myself and the others he has dated (I'm 12 yrs older than him).

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