Hi Robin,
The best way to remove those mats is with a mens beard trimmer.It is very quiet, gentle and battery operated so it should not upset her.
You can also use a spray detangler made for childrens hair.
Please let me know how this works out and if you have more questions. I am happy to help,
Very sincerely,
Terri
Feline Healthcare Expert
Expert in feline health and behavior. 20 years experience with cats.